Tristan

Tristan loves Dad

2007-12-22T13:17:00.001-05:00

I apparently posted this on Twitter, but not here.

Anyway, a few days ago, as I was getting Tristan ready for school, he
must have heard his dad talking, and realized he was up.

Because he entered our bedroom, and upon seeing his father in bed,
instead of turning around, knowing not to wake him up, as he usually
does, he looked right at him and said "Dad."

I alerted Neal to this (it was so quick, that if you weren't paying
attention, you might not have realized what he said).

Neal opened his eyes and talked to him a bit, and told him he loved
him. Tristan made direct eye contact with him (to note Tristan will
seek out eye contact on his own terms - so this isn't as major as for
a child who doesn't make eye contact) while Neal spoke with him, and
when Neal was done, He jumped up and down, smiling.

This was something that made Tristan very happy, but also made Neal
very happy as our kids are very much Momma's kids, and if I'm home
will usually seek out affection from me, rather than Dad.

2007-10-04T21:37:00.001-04:00

Tristan is not soulless, either

http://leftbrainrightbrain.co.uk/?p=682

ga ga ga ga

2007-06-17T09:13:00.001-04:00

Lily and I were dancing in the garage last night to music. Tristan
would sometimes come closer to us and dance around us or watch us. (I
observed him doing the same recently when I picked him up from school
- not sure if I blogged it at all, it was encouraging to see him
interacting w/ his peers a little...)

At one point, I started hopping in circles with my arms out and said
ga ga ga ga (a sound he frequently makes when happy - he also
sometimes says "goodagoodagooda")

He grinned and came up to me and danced around me and reached his hand
out to try and touch my hands. then he took my hand and danced with me
a bit. It was a very happy moment.

I Just Love This and recent Trister happenings

2007-05-10T16:31:00.001-04:00

I just love this:
"sazriel posted a reply:

in response to soulstealer, but not necesarily the topic:
beaver leader is a fun phrase. try it aloud.
i'd never want to be not autistic, 'cause then i wouldn't have things
like beaver leader, even though i might have friends instead."

This is something someone on one of my Flickr Autism groups posted, in
response to a parent who had commented that she is a Beaver Leader in
her son's Beaver Scouts group, so he can have freedom while she can
still keep an eye on him. I just love it. I feel it really has an
interesting perspective to it.

---------------------------------------------

I woke up this morning to find Tristan curled up in bed next to his
sister, Lola. Yesterday, he'd been on the very edge of my bed when I
woke up and when I got out of bed he slowly moved to be curled up next
to Lily (we're staying in the basement of my inlaws' right now, so
we're all in one really big room pretty much - we'll be moving soon,
to our very own house)

Tristan also had his eyes pretty much glued shut with goop this
morning. Initially thought the discharge was allergies or sinus
infection, but that's primarily because he doesn't open his eyes very
wide. nope. he has pink eye. :( and I'm probably gonna get it cause I
was wiping him off without washing my hands immediately yesterday
evening...

The other day, after a night of not sleeping and repeatedly smacking
or kicking us in our sleep, I brought him into the family room, so dad
and sister could sleep, and I could take a shower and get ready.... I
put him on the couch; he pointed at the TV and said TV (well the v
wasn't clearly pronounced, but it was obviously TV) so I turned on
some cartoons for him. He was asleep by a few minutes of me getting
out of the shower - he continued his crazy running around and hitting
at school, apparently. They'd never seen this behavior. I'm pretty
sure it's a behavior that is exhibited when he is really really really
really tired. normally he's just grumpy and uncooperative when tired,
and rocks on his belly on the floor a lot.

No and Sharing

2007-05-02T10:40:00.001-04:00

I got a video of this. when I have the patience for it I'll upload it
somewhere...

anyway, I had Lily sitting on the counter and Tristan sitting at the
counter and I was giving them strawberries, one at a time.

Well, every time I gave Tristan one, Lily would yell "no!" at him, so
I decided to try and get a video of it.

Well, she says no, then she grins because she knows why I'm
videotaping (yes, I know, I shouldn't encourage her) and squeals at
him again. He then, without a second thought, hands the strawberry to
her.

I was floored

and of course got him another one (the last one) since he was such a
good sharing brother.

He definitely gets it

2007-04-22T18:10:00.001-04:00

Tristan was playing with a spatula that was used to make french toast
this morning (made by his wonderful Nanna).

She tried to take it away, because it was messy, and he got mad, so
she gave it back.

I said, "Tristan, let me clean that and he gave it right to me." :) I
cleaned it and gave it back.

I was so surprised by the response, especially since it was immediate.
I was expecting to have to take it away have him complain and give it
back after I cleaned it. but nope he gave it right to me. :) :)

Hungry

2007-04-21T10:06:00.001-04:00

Tristan slept from picking the drive home all the way till bedtime. He
woke up about bedtime, held his hands together and said "hungr" (two
syllables). We were like wow. He said he was hungry!

Cooperation

2007-03-14T21:37:00.001-04:00

He had a cup of juice w/ dinner

Lily wanted it. made complaining baby sounds.

When he'd just about finished it, he walked up to her highchair and
gave her the last little bit.

More on the schools front

2007-03-12T13:43:00.001-04:00

to paraphrase

any district can use the program he's in

but they've got to do an iep to decide if they want to

and if they want the money for his head (headcounts = money) and think
they can handle him, they won't. (my words here not theirs)

yay.

and can't rule out schools of choice but don't believe any district
would be willing to give up a space in the program to an out of
district student.

I'm sorry, I realize you want the best for your kid, but it's really
all about money (my words again, not theirs, though they did genuinely
offer their sympathies, this here is sarcasm). You just don't realize
that unless your kid isn't typical or somewhat typical. We expect that
you just don't care and blindly send him where ever the school
district chooses (which, admittedly, is what I did to start but I'm
just damn lucky the school district he's in chose what's best for him,
and didn't give me any reason to question it).

*beats head against the wall*

Of course, if my mother didn't decide to move to EL to be close to my
sister when we'd move up here I'd be blissfully unaware that there
were better school districts in the area, and maybe it wouldn't have
occurred to me to look around for the best damn thing for my kids...

Google Talk Conversation

2007-02-23T18:47:00.001-05:00

Navi: wow.
tristan will raid it later [referring to pizza and children's lack of eating it]
unless he's asleep on our bed [he was on our bed when I left for work]
neal: actually hes asleep on top of the table i'm moving him to bed

Their own level of communication

2007-02-18T11:34:00.001-05:00

Look in my room - Tristan's climbing the dresser, Lily's watching
Lily comes out of the bedroom. with her sippy cup (which had water)
stacked on a cup that was on the dresser
- She wants me to get milk for both of them.

Tristan's eating spaghetti in his high chair. Lily approaches him. and
he drops some right in her hand.

Tristan removes his diaper because he wants it changed. Lily comes out
holding the diaper and bringing it to me while shouting mamaa!

Just Like Lola

2007-02-05T10:18:00.001-05:00

made the mistake of leaving candy out where he could see it.

Tristan decided he wanted it, and cried when he could have it. cried
so hard he was coughing. wouldn't eat anything else.

Calmed down in the car, but still didn't eat the cheerios I'd packed for him.

got to school he was still calm but still grumpy. dropped him off, let
the teachers know he was grumpy and hadn't eaten anything. closed the
door and looked at him as they were getting his coat off through the
little window.

His face was set just like Lola's when she's not happy about
something. All serious and straight and looking like humph.

Autism Conversation

2007-01-27T10:13:00.001-05:00

coworker sent me this from metafind:
http://www.metafilter.com/mefi/58058

some very interesting conversation in there. I haven't yet checked out the info.

on communication/language - quite frequently, in Tristan's utterances,
there are parts of words in there. I'm sure he says a lot more that is
English than I realize, I just can't understand it. The idea of the
utterances being a form of communication is interesting.

on facilitated communication and it's debunking. I'm quite a skeptic.
but some of the holding tristan's hand in a pointing position, and
letting him point, well I've tried it, and when he cooperates, it's
him pointing. more often he just takes my hand and puts in on there.
His old language therapist, who was also a skeptic on faciliitated
communication was doing that with him when she realized it was
facilitated communication. I'm pretty sure that in some cases it works
but in other cases you are getting more speech from the facilitator
than the individual.

on what little I've read of autistics and their perspectives. For some
of the lower functioning autistics that have achieved speech - it does
seem there experiences very heavily weigh in on their speech. I've
heard the opinions that it's a different way of doing things, and
should be respected. and then there's the girl in CNN's Autism is a
World that refers to her behaviors as "killer autism behaviors." I'll
have to admit I found the phrase somewhat offensive. I'm sure there's
also those that were heavily affected and rebelled against the
opinions of those in our lives. We neurotypicals are the same, in that
respect. Our environment can have a heavy effect on our opinions,
though it doesn't always. I will have to admit that it seems far
easier for a high functioning person to say "accept us as we are" than
to say that in reference to someone who is very low functioning.

on autistics communicating with eachother - I believe it. There's this
little girl - that does have speech in Tristan's class. When I've
brought him to school late, she's run to him and hugged him, and let
him go when he wanted to be let go (I can tell he wanted to be let go
because of how he was trying to move out of her arms - she instantly
released him, most children, I think there would have been a delay).
Most recently she pointed at him and said There's Tristan! and ran to
him and hugged him. When he got on the bus today (well yesterday now,
I'm finishing up this post), instead of going on his usual route to
his seat, he walked straight over to her and hugged her. I was
floored. As far as I could tell, he does not acknowledge other
children. Sometimes he acknowledges his older sister but then she
likes playing mommy and it's probably because he views her as a sort
of pseudo parent - she helps us with him by getting him things and
she'll put up with him climing over her or curling up next to her. The
only child I've seen him interact with without an initial interaction
is his baby sister, but then they are in many ways on the same level
developmentally. makes me wonder about all the comments relating
behaviors to those of pre-language children. maybe there is some level
of communication going on btw him and his sister that I don't
understand.

I also agree that more often the problem is we don't understand them
than that they don't understand us. I'm pretty sure Tristan
understands when he's paying attention. Yesterday (now two days ago)
when I picked him up from daycare, he laid on the floor after I got
his coat on, looking back and forth between me and the girl that takes
care of him at daycare. I bent down and held out my hand, and he
continued to look at me. While making eye contact, I said, I'll pick
you up if you stand up, but I'm not picking you up from a laying down
position. As soon as I said that he got right up and held his arms up
to be picked up. Now that could have been a delayed response to me
holding my hand out (he doesn't always take my hand when I do that
sometimes he just gets up) but I'm pretty sure it was in response to
my words. Of course, maybe he just picked out the term "pick you up"
and figured it out.

Autism Epidemic

2007-01-20T11:59:00.001-05:00

>From Slate:
http://www.slate.com/id/2157496/

the article discusses (and dismisses) the idea of an Autism Epidemic
and discusses the book, Unstrange Minds.

A quote from the article:
"I am incredibly disciplined in the diagnostic classifications in my
research," Judy Rapoport, a senior child psychiatrist at the National
Institutes of Health, tells Grinker, "but in my private practice, I'll
call a kid a zebra if it will get him the educational services I think
he needs."

The article basically points out that chances are, the rates of Autism
aren't really growing as much as they seem to be. Autism wasn't even a
term until the 40s. According to the the article, "Psychiatrists made
no real effort to systematically diagnose childhood mental illness,
Grinker writes, until 1980, when the American Psychiatric Association
published the third edition of its diagnostic manual."

Autism isn't like a newly discovered disease that is caused by a virus
that wasn't in our country before it was diagnosed, but the media sure
treats it like it is.

And I'm not a parent of a high functioning child, I'm the parent of a
low functioning child. It would be nice to think that there could be a
cause that can be reversed and prevented but I just don't swallow it.
It's not realistic. I could agree that environmental causes could be
factors that may increase the likelyhood of occurrence when there is
already a genetic predisposition. I also agree that environmental
factors could make symptoms worse. While I don't prescribe to some of
the diet solutions, and I don't really feel they would help my son (we
significantly reduced dairy intake, for example, with no noticeable
improvement, though schooling has left a noticeable improvement,
though since he doesn't need 6 cups of milk a day, we haven't
increased the dairy, since he's just as happy with water, most of the
time), I can see where they'd be helpful to someone that's sensitive.
I've also noticed Tristan seems better with whole wheat products. They
still have gluten in them, but they're healthier, and therefore he
feels better.

Now that I've gone off on a tangent, back to the article. It closes
with the following:
There's one more thing to be said for the cries of "epidemic"—they get
the research money flowing.

I have to agree with that notion. I'm just concerned that the cries of
epidemic are steering research money in the wrong direction.

getting hugs

2007-01-13T12:42:00.001-05:00

dropped tristan off at school late on Friday - this is his new school,
where all of the kids are autistic.

As soon as he entered the classroom a girl, who was taller (and
probably a bit older - it's a prek-2nd grade classroom) immediately
hugged him (or maybe she was trying to keep him coralled) as soon as
he indicated he wanted out of the hug, she let go.

I found this interesting, as generally I don't see this sort of direct
interaction in him, except w/ adults.

It's encouraging.

cake

2007-01-02T13:27:00.000-05:00

Yesterday or the day before. I'm in bed w/ the baby, we're both sick.

Tristan comes in the room.

I shout to my husband, "Tristan wants some chocolate cake!"

He replies, "How do you know?"

"Because he's giving it to me!"

(cake's in a container so it wasn't messy until after his dad fed it to him)

hug

2006-12-29T21:31:00.001-05:00

can't believe I didn't post.

Yesterday tristan was standing on a chair and hugged me and said hug
and proceeded to continue hugging me and then asked to be held upside
down by leaning his head back.

argh

2006-12-27T20:09:00.001-05:00

so I'm making beef fried rice (in one pan) so I cooked the meat and
stored it in a sealed container while I cooked the rice. tristan's
hugging it, real cute. well after taking it away repeatedly, he
apparently managed to hug it so hard that he's squeezed it open and
dumped half of it all over the place. then he proceeded to cry at me
until I fed him, though it appears he's distracted himself for a
moment.

chocolate cake

2006-12-27T17:42:00.001-05:00

and now he's painting himself with the cake in the process of trying
to get it off his fingers...

birthday cake

2006-12-27T17:29:00.001-05:00

just had tristan put his birthday cake in my hand, upside down, in its
container. I think he wants some...

door

2006-12-27T16:37:00.001-05:00

tristan is swinging my bedroom door back and forth from the wall and
putting his hand in between the door and wall and laughing and
jabbering at it and saying something that sounds like ow and aaaaaa

now he's tapping the doorknob with a stick in his right hand while
continuing to do the above.

he seems quite content.

pressies

2006-12-26T10:52:00.001-05:00

trying to figure what I can get tristan that he'll play with as much
as he's been playing w/ his christmas present....

drummy

2006-12-25T11:43:00.001-05:00

Christmas was interesting for trister. He ran all over the house (and
his sister crawled) during present unwrapping, so I had to either open
gifts for him or chase him down and pick him up or chase him down and
open in front of him.

he got all sorts of baby toys, which is good, because they're the kind
that make sounds or have interesting textures. He likes them.

I got him a music set, with a drum on a stick, a stick with bells, a
triangle, a weird stick thing, and maracas (sp?). He loves the drom
and the maracas. He likes to tap a maraca on things and likes to tap
things on the drum :)

Santa put a play kitchen utensil set in his stocking. little metal
ladels and spatula and whisk and a wooden spoon and spatula. he liked
them, and used them to tap on his drum.

right now he is tapping a plastic spoon on a cookie, and I have to go
save the cookies from him.

pressies

2006-12-23T23:29:00.001-05:00

Got this music set with what looks like a tamborine on a stick with no
symbols for trister

opened it up (but didn't take it out) and showed it to him to see how
he likes it.

I loved it and tapped on and stroked the drum and tried to take it out
of the container.

hopefully we get that reaction on christmas eve. :)

Yo-Yo Ma

2006-12-19T20:43:00.000-05:00

I am such a .... I don't know.

I couldn't resist and gave them their present early (imma doing the
real shopping on friday anyway)

anyway. the classical music on tv seems to have lowered the volume in
my household just a bit. and it is much more relaxing than regular tv.
:D

dvd we're watching, vol 3 struggle for hope, had too much explaining
how they made it in the beginning but the music is beautiful.

Toy tristan likes

2006-12-19T20:30:00.000-05:00

tristan doesn't 'play' with toys.

He sure likes this thing though (Lily's bday pressie from godmom):
http://trus.imageg.net/graphics/product_images/pTRU1-2878312dt.jpg

and aaaaaaaaaaack bloggers down!

2006-12-19T20:08:00.001-05:00

Plugged Autism Search

Pluggd Demo

found via Wired

podcast audio search

messy boy

2006-12-14T22:01:00.001-05:00

my completely messy just woke up from a nap crying boy has turned into
a clean content boy after a shower and then a bath. :)

it will take days to fix the mess he made whilst I was at work :(

This is my life

2006-12-08T22:25:00.001-05:00

looking forward to two IEPs in one week.

Tristan already had one, but he needs another because they're moving
him to a new school.

AI Program visit

2006-12-05T20:33:00.001-05:00

visited tristan's potential new school.

It's closer to Lola's (I can see trying to arrange parent teacher
conferences on the same day) but harder to get in and out of than his
current school (not the school itself but the neighborhood - train
tracks and other schools in the area pose issues). So it may or may
not be easier to get him there if he misses the bus.

It's not set in stone - some children need to transition out for him
to transition in. but it's pretty sure he'll begin after winter break.

I never think to ask questions...

All the kids there are autistic. and I was amazed at how they all sat
for story time and listening to music time.

The all use picture schedules much like Tristan's object schedule. and
some facilitated communication (holding the childs hand to help the
child focus and direct)

There's a variety of developmental abilities in the small room.

The teacher's son goes to the same daycare as tristan does after
school and she plans on popping in when she picks up her son to
observe him :) so she can meet him. She'll also be visiting his
regular school when she gets a chance.

They'll start letting him do whatever, until he gets used to the
class. He'll then have alternating choice time and specific
instructrion time. They'll also help steer choice time to be
beneficial.

They have a trampoline in the room :D

fingers are crossed that everything goes smoothly and this is good for him.

Also, as we were wrapping up, one of the boys that will be
transitioning out came by and gave the autism specialist a half hug,
and lightly pressed against my side for a second. I explaind that
Tristan also does stuff like that and will spontaneously go up to you
and hug you sometimes. His current teacher then remarked, with a smile
that they will miss him very much. :)

found at meijer

2006-12-05T19:35:00.001-05:00

pro
freshionals

corn brush

by Good Cook

for $2.99

Just like those little brushes they use for therapy for Tristan,
except oval instead of square.
If you read and remember the name of the therapy, please reply! It
involves brushing his limbs and moving his joints.

With a nice handle. The handle is also the perfect size for Tristan to
hang on to, as he likes to have an item of that size, preferably
roundish, in his hand.

two birds w/ one stone. yay!

and I found it at the Okemos Meijer to be exact. In the produce aisle,
on a little stand with hang tags. had other producy items like another
type of brush that resembled a round scrub brush. It was near the
center aisle. (in case by some freak chance someone in the area who
needs a one of those things happens to read this)

I'll like maybe bring it to ganpa's and post a pic on flickr with this
same description, I think.

AI program

2006-11-30T13:25:00.001-05:00

We are looking at putting tristan in our county's AI program:
http://www.inghamisd.org/schools/ai_program.html

there's an opening and since tristan wil be four soon, we can look at
different options for him, other than the special needs preschool
class he's in.

This will offer a full day of instruction, and will be in an area
school, with bussing provided by his home district

They say it's an intensive program and most kids don't need to
continue through 5th grade full day and most are able to function in a
regular classroom within a few years

I have my fingers crossed that all goes well

I visit it next Tuesday.

I'm pretty amazed at how he seems to get into these programs with
limited openings.

the fall after he was in Early On, they got him in preschool at not
quite 3 (the law says 2.5 but usually they wait until the child is 3
unless they believe education will be beneficial earlier) and he got
into a limited seat summer program so he had school all summer, and
now this. I am pleased. They keep saying that a lot of things he does
are really good signs (like being able to tell between skittles and an
m&m wrapper). I'm hopeful but cautious.

I've read that usually real intensive 40hr/week therapy is needed for
progress in kids like him and usually it's better started earlier, as
in the 2-3 range rather than the 4 yr old range, but they seem to
think he will be a kid that will be able to progress significantly in
this program. I really hope so. I know he's bright but it's all
internal and hard for people to see. He likes school so much, I'm
hoping for the best. I also like that even for the lower developed
kids, they still attempt to integrate them with neurotypical children
for at least a few minutes.

they also apparently frequently take trips to the haslett high school
pool. and he loves loves loves to swim. so that is good. The school he
was at in the summer I think had an on site pool so he went there
frequently and I'd get notes on how he loves to swim - I know this of
course from his time in the bathtub and his tendency to try to jump in
the pool at grandpa's - I remember him jumping in the deep end once
and he kept himself afloat for the fraction of a second before my
husband leaped in faster than I've ever seen him move to grab him. and
at a low depth family pool we went to with his godmom he was just
jumping under water. it as great.

I know I said part of me feels like this is another lets get tristan
outta here but it's better for him so even if it is it's okay (he
switched teachers from last school year, but I think that was
partially because his teacher's classroom was changing)

part of me also wonders about that I asked at his IEP in Oct if he
should get any additional therapy of any sort, and they said no, what
was at his school is fine, but maybe that was partially because they
were hoping to get him in this program that will provide what he
needs.

all my fingers are crossed. I want the best for him. and I want him to
be happy and school seems to make him happy.

tristan & stuff

2006-11-28T08:04:00.000-05:00

haven't posted much about the kids lately. and the one person who
reads the regularly will know about this stuff already anyway.

tristan has said "alu" and "alu-oo, mom" recently, when giving a hug.
the alu or alu-oo has been around awhile (it's "I love you" as one
word, and probably means "hug!"). But, alu-oo, mom is putting two
words together.

and trister is looking at a possible spot in a full day school for
autistic children. yay! he'll go back to his main school once he meets
"certain developmental milestones," whatever that means.

He gets to go there in January, assuming everything runs smoothly,
since he's going to 4. It'd be nice if the age for such programs was
lower, as I've heard earlier intervention is better done earlier.

spam posting bout lily now

2006-11-20T21:49:00.001-05:00

(well I'm not spam posting on lily's blog since I think the last few
posts that mentioned her didn't get sent there I'm spam posting on the
main blog with all of us)

anyway.

she stayed w/ a friend while neal went a hunting and I learned....

SHE WILL FALL ASLEEP IN HER PLAYPEN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(we don't have room for a crib)

WaHooooooooooooooooooooooo!

and now tristan's gonna climb in and wake her up. actually I think he
thought about it saw her sleeping and changed his mind. but it still
woke her up.

oh, and one more thing on tristan

2006-11-20T21:46:00.001-05:00

not sure if I mentioned this here but he's been copying his sister's
bledder bledder bleh, I guess cause he sees us doing it back and forth
with her and getting so excited (we get excited with him too but I
guess it's easier for him if he's observing us w/ her)

so she's like waving if you say hello, esp if you wave at her

so I'm doing that more anamatedly, since the school is working on
getting him to wave

communication.

2006-11-20T21:17:00.000-05:00

last week, I think maybe on Friday, I pointed towards the bus as he
was contemplating the playground and he walked toward it.

Today I came and picked him up from daycare, and held his hand instead
of picking him up.

One of the teachers there asked for a hug before he left, he turned
towards her but hesitated (I interpretted that as yes I want a hug but
don't take me from mommy, I'm ready to go home)

When we got out of the fence (he'd been outside), I directed him
towards the car and asked him where he goes.

Initially he hesitated. then I turned him towards the car again and
asked again. I then put my hand in his and he took me to the door and
brought my hand towards the handle..

When we got home I held his hand and took him w/ me to check the mail
(the boxes are under a stairwell) He just danced around nearby (did
not take off) while I checked the mail.

I then took his hand and we walked towards our apartment. he pulled
back until I switched so he was just holding my finger, instead of
holding hands. I then let go as we stood in front of the door and
asked him to go in. I opened the screen door, he did not take off, I
opened the inside door and he went right in (he usually tries to run
around outside when we are heading home, if he's awake enough).

Then I had come out of the bathroom, and he decided he wanted a bath
so after I'd closed the door he took my hand and then put it on the
knob :)

fishy

2006-11-19T21:11:00.001-05:00

he's had I don't know how many shower/baths today - basically cause
I'm being lazy and he loves it - um, like um it's water therapy - ya
that's it ;)

exhausting

2006-11-18T21:01:00.000-05:00

I just had to jump up and down singing and dancing and clapping to
keep the little ones from crying while waiting for Lola to get out of
the shower so I could put Tristan in.

Poop.

2006-11-08T22:45:00.001-05:00

Poop.

poop. poop. poop.

That's the last time I say my son doesn't do something that people say
autistic kids do. I swear every time I do, he starts it up (I said he
didn't smear back when he was first diagnosed. but then, he was only
2.5 then, bout a year or so ago - god it feels like ages).

I get to clean the bathtub.

again.

I cleaned it out this morning....

I guess it's better in the bathtub than in his bedroom. or on my bed.

wait time

2006-11-05T09:08:00.001-05:00

at his iep we discussed wait time (this was like oct 27)

we had noticed that according to the notes that got sent home, he was following directions at his summer school after 2 prompts, but didn't appear to be doing that here

the summer school class had all autistic children and had 4 hrs vs 2.5 hrs

they figured the summer school was probably giving him more time to respond and therefore caught him following directions.

they recommended at the iep giving him wait time.

so he was sitting across from me the other night wasn't playing w/ anything really and kept looking at me.

so I clapped my hands, held my arms out (he used to come running as soon as I did this) and said hug, slowly over and over again, while keeping my arms out and looking at him.

He eventually grinned at me got up and came over for a hug.

tried I think later that evening or the next day and it didn't work but he had something he was playing with and Lily was trying to hug me at the same time. He did look up at me and grin, which indicates he acknowledged the request, I think.

Oh, and at the iep, they said the couple of times it sounded like he was saying my name, probably was my name :)

high chair

2006-11-04T21:22:00.001-05:00

mommy's hand on try = more food

mommy's hand on side = let me out!

:)

Halloween

2006-11-02T12:36:00.000-05:00

HPIM0916
Originally uploaded by navidoll.

(the description in the photo describes the same)

Tristan doesn't seem to get it.

We'd go up to the houses, he'd get all excited. and get mad when he didn't get to go in or couldn't bury his face in the candy bowl they held out to him.

He did seem to like dancing on the decks, when they had decks, and he was very interested in scary decorations.

When we were wrapping things up, we were tired, so we let Lola go up to the houses across the street from where we were and we watched her go, with the strollers kept with us. Lola always got some candy for Tristan (when she stops and thinks, she's the most considerate little girl, she just doesn't always stop and think).

We hadn't had him strapped in the stroller, as we'd been getting him out and walking him up to the doorsteps earlier. So after once or twice watching Lola go up and get candy, he decided to copy her, got up out of the stroller, grabbed my hand, and let me walk him across the street.

He did get mad again when we skipped a house she'd gone to so we could catch up though.

Understanding?

2006-10-20T12:50:00.000-04:00

I picked him up from daycare yesterday, and had Lily w/ me.

So I put his hand on the car while I get her in. (he tends to run off otherwise and this way he either stays there or he strokes the car before running off, so I have time to at least get her in the car, if not buckle her up, before getting him)

Well this time, he tried to go in on the side I was loading Lily (probably 'cause usually I put his hand on the car, throw all his stuff thruogh the window and then get him in)

I said "No, Tristan, you get in on the other side"

I don't know if he understood me, or noticed his booster seat wasn't on that side, but he immediately walked around the car to his door and proceeded to stroke it.

Then he started stroking the truck next to us, in which a father had just completed loading himself and his daughter, so I figured I better stop buckling Lily before Tristan got himself run over.... (thankfully, however, the dad had seen tristan and didn't move until I got him in the car and moved to the other side to finish buckling Lily)

Mom

2006-10-11T22:26:00.000-04:00

I hear a kid say "Mom"

I figured it was Lola.

nope.

Tristan was in the shower, had said Mom (word's come and go so a singular mom and not mom mom mom is rare, esp when sounding like he's calling for me and not just saying mom)

well he'd been taking a shower

only he'd managed to plug the tub (the right way, with the lever, and not with tp)

and it was overflowing

I guess he figured he had to let me know.

More on More food

2006-10-06T12:34:00.000-04:00

Last night, when we were eating mcdonalds...

Tristan had his own nuggets

He finished them, held his hands together (he'd been taught the sign for more - he doesn't do it exactly, but we get the idea)
He then looked at us with a face that said, "please." He didn't make a noise.

Well, he most certainly got more food and loads of praise from mom for being sooooo polite.

I'm pretty sure most of the time he gets into things and gets surly and makes messes are simply because we don't pick up the cues he's giving us beforehand.

spinning

2006-10-02T21:45:00.000-04:00

He was spinning in circles, and I started spinning right alongside him. and then he grabbed my hands and started jumping with me and then spinning in circles holding my hands and we were spinning together and then we were jumping again. He'd gotten so happy that I was copying him and he was really engaging me. it was pure fun.

Online Autism Conference

2006-09-28T21:44:00.000-04:00

I'm gonna try and attend a bit
http://www.awares.org/conferences/default.asp

No Hot Water

2006-09-10T18:17:00.000-04:00

We lost our hot water during the aforementioned bath (it was actually a shower - so not so good - luckily the lil one doesn't mind cool water too much)

We regained it - just in time for Trister to cover himself head to foot in poop.

Understanding!

2006-09-10T10:10:00.000-04:00

He definitely knows the word bath.

I asked him if he wanted one, then he let me take his hand, and instead of leading him to the bathroom, I said, where do we go when we want a bath? and he walked straight over there.

He will also walk right into his bedroom after we've said it's bedtime frequently, even if he doesn't want to go. and last night he opened his bedroom door, and peered out and then walked straight to the bathroom got in the bathtub and put his hand on the faucet, like "can I have a bath?" because he'd been sent to bed without one.

communication is sweet

nearness

2006-08-29T22:04:00.000-04:00

so tristan has taken to climbing behind me on the chair if I'm on neal's computer. sometimes he does the rocking on his belly thing that looks weird and I distract him, as the school suggests that. This evening he climed up here and laid on his back behind me with his feet in the air playing with somethign (I don't remember what it was, he likes to play with objects in his hands) wish I had my camera handy at the time.

Hugs

2006-08-23T18:51:00.000-04:00

Joy is having him turn look you straight in the eye, walk up to you, and open his arms while smiling

:)

Soooo Cute

2006-08-18T23:24:00.000-04:00

Tristan has been put to bed.

I just heard him, it sounded like he was right by his door (he climbs
off the bed and falls asleep there frequently)

he said, quietly, 'wiwy' (which we've figured is 'Lily')

I had to fight the urge to run in there, scoop him up and hug him.

New Combined blog!

2006-08-17T15:53:00.000-04:00

Beware, also has my random thoughts

but news about kids too!

NaviMama

so far I've just got Lily and Tristan's March 1 posts up.

oh, and I'll still be updating these, too. the new one is if people only want one blog to check. email posts will make it fairly easy to cross post. I'm keeping these up in case any of the small handful of people who reads these only wants to check one of the blogs.

hugs

2006-08-06T17:01:00.000-04:00

hugs
Originally uploaded by navidoll.

he came up to me as I was at the puter and rested his head on my shoulder and was hugging me (alternating between shoulders) and then he grabbed my cheeks and ran away. was trying to aim lower with the camera to have more of him in the shot. none of the other pictures came out right. this was the closest

kinda hard to aim when the kid is hanging on your arms.

then afterward, I went to take care of some groceries, and he took my hand and walked to the water table and proudly showed me that he had dumped my camera in it...

more water table

2006-08-06T16:09:00.000-04:00

I pushed it under the table to get it out of the way as we were
heading to go shopping. it's just barely under the table so he pulled
the drawer out just a bit so he could still play with the water

Water Table

2006-08-06T11:08:00.000-04:00

Water Table
Originally uploaded by navidoll.

Just totally made Tristan's day.

Tested the drawer, to make sure it would hold water without leaking, then ripped the top off of it and turned it into an inexpensive water table. He had fun. after Lola walked away, he proceeded to dance around it with one hand in the water. :)

sleepy

2006-08-01T09:18:00.000-04:00

Tristan likes to sleep near a fan

We were trying to get Lily to sleep in her playyard and had a fan
nearby. She was going in and out of it because she'd wake up and
scream when we tried to put her in it. Tristan apparently figured out
that she'd be sleeping there and pointed the fan towards the playpen
and then curled up on the floor with a pillow right next to the
playpen.

Cuteness

2006-07-30T16:57:00.000-04:00

2 things

was laying on the bed w/Lily

Tristan came up, and rocked his head on my shoulder so I could kiss
his cheek then he put his lips on my cheek (he doesn't actually kiss)

Then

he laid his head on my knee when I was sitting on the couch looked up
at me and said "luthe yoo"

2006-07-21T09:20:00.000-04:00

Tristan got up today and walked into my room. Climbed on my bed by
Lily and carefully walked over her and then cuddled my head. He then
proceeded to move around on the bed and periodically come over to me
for more cuddles. so cute.

This post is supposed to be titled waking up but email posting isn't working and well for some reason blogger doesn't let me put a title on the trister's blog when posting from there.

poo

2006-07-15T01:56:00.000-04:00

all over my sister's basement....

circles

2006-06-30T22:39:00.000-04:00

Tristan likes to put something on the floor and dance around it. One
of the bus drivers thought it might be duck duck goose he's imitating.

Well, I was sitting on the floor, so he started dancing round and
round me. and ended it by climbing in my lap and saying what sounds
like "hug you".

haircut

2006-06-24T13:47:00.000-04:00

I think he's digging his haircut. He keeps putting his face or the
side of his head or the back of his head on my face, or my shoulder or
my lap...

course, last night, neal lightly scratched his head like he
occasionally does and tristan cried. I guess he wasn't ready for it w/
his haircut. just mommy can mess with the new do, I guess.

smiles

2006-06-23T20:29:00.000-04:00

asked if I could take more pictures. He looked at me sideways.

asked for a hug, including clap clap and motion by holding my arms
out, palms and two fingers up and motioned to 'come here' with the two
fingers on each hand.

he looked straight at me grinned, and came over and hugged me

sooooo cute!

spinning cheese

2006-06-23T00:02:00.000-04:00

spinning cheese
Originally uploaded by navidoll.

he's spinning a parmesan cheese shaker

mmmmm Cotton Candy

2006-06-23T00:01:00.000-04:00

Cotton Candy
Originally uploaded by navidoll.

he just grabbed a chunk and shoved it in his mouth. He really liked the texture of it. we figured he would he has a bad habit of eating tissue.

I had a picture of him with a bigger chunk but the batteries died and didn't save it :(

I took the big chunk away from him and gave him a small piece after taking the shot. figured this was a little too much at once.

Standing on a table

2006-06-22T23:58:00.000-04:00

HPIM0936
Originally uploaded by navidoll.

squeeee

2006-06-22T23:38:00.000-04:00

ran towards the little guy squealing...

and then hugged him

he looked startled like he didn't know what was going on, and then
smiled. he loves hugs.

2006-06-15T18:59:00.000-04:00

Godmom and I took all three to the aquatic center (a big outdoor pool
with 0" depth that slowly goes up to about 3 or 4 feet plus a couple
sectioned off deeper areas).

While he'll float in the bathtub if there's enough water, he's too
cautious to completely try there.

but he absolutely loved it

an he was jumping up and down and dunking himself
and he liked it when godmom tossed him in the water and caught him
just as he hit the water
and he also would walk on his hands and kick with his feet (he could
go pretty fast doing that)
and at one point he tried to copy my doggy paddle with one toe on the
bottom of the pool.

also in dunking himself cause he completely lets his arms and legs go
wild he scared both godmom at one point when he first got in an
another woman (I was making my way toward him) cause it looked like he
was falling under.

and he was smiling and happy and he loved the little falls and the
area where the water spurts up

an he was cautious on the toddler water slide.

It was so amazing watching him.

His smile lights up the room

2006-06-15T12:03:00.000-04:00

Lily is in daycare today. so trister and Lola can have more of my
attention today. and well tristan, he's so... I don't know how to
describe it. He just, is happy and well I don't know, when I've been
just focusing on him, I feel so un-stressed. (which is a feeling I
don't feel to often lately)

Tristan and Lily

2006-06-13T14:01:00.000-04:00

Tristan and Lily
Originally uploaded by navidoll.

Celebrate Neurodiversity

2006-06-13T00:17:00.000-04:00

Austistic Pride Day is on Father's day.

Interesting. For us it's the first father's day after Tristan was
labeled autistic.

http://www.aspiesforfreedom.org/wiki/index.php?title=Autistic_Pride_Day

http://www.aspiesforfreedom.org/autisticprideday/

the first link explains why the date was chosen.

siblings

2006-06-10T21:23:00.000-04:00

Tristan keeps going up to Lily and cuddling her, they'll hold hands,
or just now, he put his face gently next to hers and she reached out
and touched his face.

easy chair

2006-06-10T21:15:00.000-04:00

tristan used to always sit in my lap and lean back on me like I was an
easy chair.

he especially liked it when I was pregnant, cause Lily would kick him.

well, he noticed lily was next to me, an not in my lap.

He then waited until Lily lifted her feet up (her feet were closest to
me an stepped between us an climbed into my lap an sat on me like I
was an easy chair.

he's since been climbing in and out of my lap and making me hug him an
tickle him.

Autism ADHD, etc

2006-05-28T22:19:00.000-04:00

Best part of the trip
Originally uploaded by Mauvis.

I've got a pic of tristan with these things and posted it. and it reminded this mom of this pic so much that she had to post it herself

This post involves comments made on the above picture and is a response to the comment above the one in which I reference this blog:

I've heard of the multi-diagnoses and misdiagnoses between the two.

So far the school system has done the primary evaluation of tristan. I need to get both of my kids evaluated further. had a bit of a bad experience with a therapist recommended by a dr we have a lot of faith in, so I'm a bit wary, I don't want to drag my kids through the number of bad therapists my husband says he went through as a child - I don't know for sure if they were bad or he just didn't like them, he has a lot of issues - My daughter's therapist treated her as a classic adhd/explosive child case and was convinced the child ruled our household when neither is true (though we are a household that negotiates and some more traditional paradigms might view that as letting the child rule) and recommended treatment that garnered a violent response from a nonviolent child - that meeting made me decide this wasn't the therapist for my daughter.

My son seems to be severely understimulated, to tell you the truth, unless it involves his head, which is primarily his ears (touch, not so much sound), and before he got the autism diagnosis, I was wondering if he didn't have an early case of adhd, that may have somehow affected him developmentally due to the early onset (complete speculation - I've never read anything of the sort). Having dealt with an adhd husband, I had noticed many similarities.

His father has been diagnosed both ADHD and bipolar disorder (another two I've heard are frequently confused with eachother, esp in children). I've been told by professionals that his older sister shows signs of both (she has a wonderful school system that has provided special ed services despite her academic excellence, that works on the areas she needs help with and she sees a social worker weekly).

He does have tantrums for no apparent reason. though we've learned it's usu related to tiredness, an inability to communicate and not getting enough attention - which are fairly normal reasons for a neurotypical 3 yr old to melt down, let alone one that's not talking yet - I started giving him something to drink or eat or putting him on my bed - a large place to lay down and family members don't go in there generally until bedtime - or laying him down near a fan or making sure I periodically look in his direction - whatever I guess appears to be the cause - and the tantrums aren't nearly as severe. there was one day I noticed him periodically watching me to see if I was paying attention and he'd start grumbling if I wasn't looking at him. He has two sisters that garner a lot of attention (esp one being an infant, and the other having her own issues) and extended family doesn't tend to interact with him a great deal (not that he sees them regularly). I've learned both my children seem to be far more intuitive than they let on and I'm sure he feels ignored.

He actually seems to like both light and heavy touch. he'll gently caress my hand against his cheek and almost never complains if I do so and he absolutely loves hugs. it's primarily the slowly developed communication, lack of social interaction with peers (he interacts up the wazoo with adults, if they pay attention, and he decides he likes them) repetative motion and severe developmental delay that seems to have given him the diagnosis. They also used an occupational therapist to evaluate him, in addition to a nurse, nutritionist, special ed teacher, social worker, and psychologist. We also noticed he ignored just about everyone who evaluated him except for the psychologist. so they didn't give him credit for eye contact (which has been discussed as overrated in this group) when he makes a ton of it, at least not really any less than the average person. The psychologist figured it may have been due to her dark hair (that happened to be a similar style to his godmother) - all of the women in his life at that time had brown hair, and the other people evaluating him had light hair. it also may have had something to do with her far more casual demeanor, and she seemed to know how to get him to interact. honestly now that I think about it, I should have found out if she takes patients or if she just works with the early on program...

coincidence?

2006-05-23T13:01:00.000-04:00

I dropped by some stuff I forgot to send off with him to school this morning.

he was near me so I crouched on the floor held my arms out and said
"can Mommy have a hug?" His teacher said "bye Mommy" so he knew I
wasn't picking him up.

He hugged me, played with my hands for a bit, and I said "you can go
play now." and then he took off.

I've no idea if he was responding to my words, or if it was a
coincidence. but it'd be nice to think he'd been responding to my
words. I think he may have been, as he usually doesn't take off from
me like that. but he was in a large open area with plenty of room to
run around.

morning boy

2006-05-21T11:12:00.000-04:00

Definitely think he's naturally a morning person, even though he tends
to stay up late.

day before yesterday he fell asleep in the car at 5pm. didn't wake up
till 530 am (yay for me having to get up that early :s )

yesterday, he fell asleep 730-8ish and stayed asleep till 730-745 AM

He's in the absolute best mood. and was in a pretty good mood
yesterday too. no crying fits like he occasionally has. except for at
grandma teresa's when they tried giving him orange juice or water
after drinking sunny d (read: he wanted more sugar!). a cup of milk
calmed him down though.

When he was an infant, he'd get cranky if he wasn't in bed by 8pm.
he'd wake up just enough to eat overnight, and completely wake up at
6am for a feeding and change and then let me relax until 8 or 10am (ie
he either went back to sleep or laid quietly next to me - the eldest
was never up before 10am at that time unless she had to be). a couple
nights of being out late at the inlaws, so he couldn't go to sleep at
8pm completely ruined it. but occasionally he gets back on that
schedule.

Basketball

2006-05-15T23:37:00.000-04:00

just posting up a storm, aren't I?

forgot. the other day.

He got home from school. had fallen asleep in the car. woke up. is
extremely grumpy and cries alot when he wakes up from a nap. -- oh, he
was just checking to see if I was watching and I wasn't :( ... -- anyway.
he was crying so I took him outside, cause he likes to be outside he
ran around sometimes wanted me to pick him up, still upset. so I
finally took him out to the basketball court and sat cross legged on
the ground. he curled up in my lap and tried to get comfortable and
complained off and on... then some boys came to play basketball. He
quieted at the sound of the ball hitting the asphalt. Apparently the
sound was soothing.

contemplation

2006-05-15T23:34:00.000-04:00

all are asleep except me and him. he's dancing around the room
(currently has an empty pop can on the floor and is dancing around
it), testing textures, talking occasionally looking at me, it's like
we're speding time but not.

My house is a mess. I want to set it up so the whole living room is a
play place for him. but I need to clean and keep clean first. I'm just
wondering what this time would be like in a more preferable
environment. right now it is awful calming. he is magical.

he never ceases to amaze

2006-05-15T23:11:00.000-04:00

he just approached me, took my hand, placed it on his cheek and put
his nose up to mine...

a priceless moment.

Sleepy

2006-05-14T23:00:00.000-04:00

HPIM0230
Originally uploaded by navidoll.

response without eye contact

2006-05-03T21:10:00.000-04:00

well there was the sticking the hand out when I wasn't even talking to him...

As he was getting out of his high chair, I put my arms out and said
"tristan I give you a hug" and kept my arms out. didn't look at me
once but came straight over (he had to walk around a basket that was
on the floor so he wasn't looking at me till he approached me...
wouldn't have been as surprising if it were a straight shot for him.

Stealing the last of a sandwich

2006-05-03T19:43:00.000-04:00

It's okay... she doesn't like the crust anyway:

All three! yipeee!

2006-05-03T19:35:00.000-04:00

All three! yipeee!
Originally uploaded by navidoll.

wait a minute... that's mommy....

2006-05-02T20:58:00.000-04:00

I think it took tristan a sec to realize it was mommy trying to get
him to stand up at school. He was going to curl up on some pillows and
I was asking him if he was tired and reaching my hand out to him and
when he looked at me and decided to get up.... I could just see him
come out of whatever he was thinking and realize it was mommy talking
to him. He got right up after that.

2006-05-01T22:30:00.000-04:00

I thought it was a cool idea.

I don't really put anything political here. this is about tristan. but it's a cool idea.

accepting

2006-04-29T21:09:00.000-04:00

this post isn't really so much about tristan.

it's about kids' reaction to him.

I go to his daycare, and kids are so excited to see him. they're like
tristan!. I pick his sister up during the week from it (he goes to
another one in the week) and the woman's son is like where's tristan?

he doesn't really pay attention to the other kids most of the time. he
gets upset easy and is in his own world. you wouldn't think they'd
like him. but they do.

but part of me doesn't wonder if his infectious joy is infectious to
others, and not just his family. When he's smiling, it's like the
whole room glows.

cute

2006-04-29T15:55:00.000-04:00

I fell asleep on the couch with the baby last night. Tristan was still
up and running around. Some time after I fell asleep, hubby wakes me
up to point out that tristan is curled up right next to us on the
chair, sleeping. He was cute. He went over there and went to sleep all
by himself. usually if he goes to sleep without coaxing he drops
wherever he happens to be - he doesn't actively curl up next to mommy
- it was cute.

lamps

2006-04-20T23:39:00.000-04:00

Trister likes putting his arm on lightbulbs. we haven't found a lamp he can't get to so he didn't have one in his room. Just found a flourescent bulbed lamp that the bulb is incased in plastic. just had it on for a couple hrs. lamp = warm, not hot. so he probably can't brake it and he probably can't burn himself on it. score!

Spoon

2006-04-18T19:24:00.000-04:00

I didn't have time to finish my lunch on my lunch so I took it with me. food container was disposable, spoon was not. so I threw the spoon in my purse after work. took it out when going through my purse and as soon as I pulled it out tristan comes across the room and grabs it. won't eat with them but he sure loves "eating" them - he taps them on his teeth and hits things with them to make sounds.

:pdoh:

2006-04-13T17:56:00.000-04:00

That pulls up an icon on the pinky forum for a pinky smacking itself in the head. like "doh!"

I left the house to get the kids and neglected to take care of the preserves. shortly after I got home, I heard Tristan in the bathroom.
I figure, okay, I left it open, and he probably wants a bath.

I get in there and the top to the jam is in the bathtub and he's covered in jam.

so I give him a shower (he loves showers and baths - he's a fish)

I go looking for the jar of jam. figured he just stuck his hand in it and ate it, like usual...

My bed, which happened not to have a sheet on it at the time, is literally covered in berry preserves, and the empty jar is in the window.

Like I said :pdoh:

At least he had fun.

sneaky boy pt 2

2006-04-09T21:06:00.000-04:00

Lily was happy. Tristan came over by her and sat next to her. He said something that sounded suspiciously like 'cuddle cuddle'. I went to reach for the camera. Then Neal goes, he's got her pacifier. He grabbed it and got up and walked away....

Stepping back

2006-04-09T16:02:00.000-04:00

I found this here: http://www.purdue.edu/UNS/html4ever/0007.Corbetta.babybrain.html

"August 2000
Researchers look at brain and behavior
development in infants

WEST LAFAYETTE, Ind. – Taking two steps forward sometimes requires a step back when it comes to babies' motor development, according to ongoing research at Purdue University.

"These findings indicate that as a baby learns a new skill, such as walking, the brain appears to reorganize itself, resulting in a temporary developmental step backward," says Daniela Corbetta, a professor of kinesiology and health science and director of Purdue's Infant Motor Development Laboratory."

Taken out of context, Tristan didn't exactly step forward normally after stepping back. He didn't show any signs until he started really walking (15 month-ish)... at 18 months, he was about 6 months behind... and now, at 3, well he's a little bit further along.

At least he seems to be consistently stepping forward now. I'm so glad he's in school.

Coins

2006-04-09T12:40:00.000-04:00

Tristan likes to suck on coins, so we have to try to keep them away from him. Well, he found some today. I went over to him and held my hand under his chin and he dropped them out of his mouth into my hand (I know, yuck, but I gotta do it). Well he's got two back up quarters in his left hand ready to replace them. so I had to grab those to before he got those in his mouth. sneaky little guy.

Long night

2006-04-05T10:52:00.000-04:00

Apparently at some point after Dad put Tristan to bed (I'd attempted to turn in early, but this didn't work out), Lola went to the bathroom (they share a room - we live in a 2 bdrm apt) and Tristan came out of the bedroom. Tristan proceeded to be very unhappy and crying. So neither Neal or I got any sleep. Neal tried feeding him some of a snack he'd made for himself. I made him numerous sandwiches, tried putting a dvd on in his and Lola's bedroom, let him sleep at the foot of our bed with the fan on. He fell asleep. but as soon as I moved him from our bed so that we could sleep in it, he woke up and proceeded crying again. We moved the fan into the living room so that he could sleep out there and be near the fan. Still didn't help. Ultimately we ended up putting him in the shower, as that seems to calm him. at the point he was almost asleep in the shower I took him out made him a sandwich and he finally went to sleep. It was well after 4 AM at this point. Then Lily started crying as soon as he was asleep (luckily she's made happy if I just feed her, so I was able to get a couple of hours of sleep in). I'm buying another fan for Tristan today. Maybe he'll be more likely to sleep in his room then.

Fishboy

2006-04-02T19:16:00.000-04:00

Tristan loves the water

Sister

2006-04-02T15:51:00.000-04:00

around the time he was peering through the blinds, Lily and I were on the couch. I was on the computer, and turned towards Lily to find Tristan between the wall and the arm of the couch gently stroking Lily's face with the back of his hand.

Kissing hands and peering outside

2006-04-02T15:44:00.000-04:00

Tristan was eating in his highchair and I think it was when i brought him seconds or something to drink but he pointed at my mouth and touched it with his finger, so I obliged, and opened it. Then he stuck the back of his hand near my mouth (he does this with his own face frequently - he used to bite his hand). I had no clue what he was doing. every time I closed my mouth, he used his finger to try to open it. the only thing I could think of is he was trying to imitate the drs office, when they were trying to check his throat. they had tried opening his mouth with the popsicle stick thing (can't remember what it's called right now). Eventually I just kissed the back of his hand. So then he kept waving his hands toward me for a kiss.

Later, he was separating the blinds to watch some kids outside. Thought it was cute. Especially because he rarely pays attention to other children. He moved before I could get a pic.

dancing

2006-04-02T00:02:00.000-05:00

Tristan likes spinning, running around things and spinning things (not sure if this is typical or a stereotype, but I've heard that's normal)

Last night he took a 2 liter of pop and balanced it on its top and started dancing and singing around it.

tonight he grabbed lipstick and was holding it up in the air and dancing around it.

he's such a cutie pie.

strength

2006-04-01T21:42:00.000-05:00

Took Tristan to urgent care Thursday night, so they could tell me he doesn't have chicken pox (school needed me to check because of a mild rash he had - he has sensitive skin)

Had the second Dr tell me he has a daughter w/ autism (first was Lily's er dr).

Tristan had fallen asleep in the car and was not happy when he got woken up to have his throat checked (he slept through everything else), so he was crying

Dr. asked me where I find the strength. I never know what to say when ppl ask that. I just explained he's normally fairly good natured. but honestly, yes, he's a handful. but he's my son. there isn't strength. it just has to be done. I need to be there for him. Just like I need to be there for Lola and Lily. and frankly I think I'm not doing the greatest job. he deserves better. There's no strength to it at all. I just do it. I wish I could bring myself to do better. I love him.

Went out with all three today

2006-03-26T18:19:00.000-05:00

We had an outing today. And taking 3 young children anywhere is always amusing.
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I put this under an lj cut for a journal I don't update anymore cause the closest thing blogger seems to have applies to all posts. This thing is long.