Autism ADHD, etc

Best part of the trip
Originally uploaded by Mauvis.

I've got a pic of tristan with these things and posted it. and it reminded this mom of this pic so much that she had to post it herself

This post involves comments made on the above picture and is a response to the comment above the one in which I reference this blog:

I've heard of the multi-diagnoses and misdiagnoses between the two.

So far the school system has done the primary evaluation of tristan. I need to get both of my kids evaluated further. had a bit of a bad experience with a therapist recommended by a dr we have a lot of faith in, so I'm a bit wary, I don't want to drag my kids through the number of bad therapists my husband says he went through as a child - I don't know for sure if they were bad or he just didn't like them, he has a lot of issues - My daughter's therapist treated her as a classic adhd/explosive child case and was convinced the child ruled our household when neither is true (though we are a household that negotiates and some more traditional paradigms might view that as letting the child rule) and recommended treatment that garnered a violent response from a nonviolent child - that meeting made me decide this wasn't the therapist for my daughter.

My son seems to be severely understimulated, to tell you the truth, unless it involves his head, which is primarily his ears (touch, not so much sound), and before he got the autism diagnosis, I was wondering if he didn't have an early case of adhd, that may have somehow affected him developmentally due to the early onset (complete speculation - I've never read anything of the sort). Having dealt with an adhd husband, I had noticed many similarities.

His father has been diagnosed both ADHD and bipolar disorder (another two I've heard are frequently confused with eachother, esp in children). I've been told by professionals that his older sister shows signs of both (she has a wonderful school system that has provided special ed services despite her academic excellence, that works on the areas she needs help with and she sees a social worker weekly).

He does have tantrums for no apparent reason. though we've learned it's usu related to tiredness, an inability to communicate and not getting enough attention - which are fairly normal reasons for a neurotypical 3 yr old to melt down, let alone one that's not talking yet - I started giving him something to drink or eat or putting him on my bed - a large place to lay down and family members don't go in there generally until bedtime - or laying him down near a fan or making sure I periodically look in his direction - whatever I guess appears to be the cause - and the tantrums aren't nearly as severe. there was one day I noticed him periodically watching me to see if I was paying attention and he'd start grumbling if I wasn't looking at him. He has two sisters that garner a lot of attention (esp one being an infant, and the other having her own issues) and extended family doesn't tend to interact with him a great deal (not that he sees them regularly). I've learned both my children seem to be far more intuitive than they let on and I'm sure he feels ignored.

He actually seems to like both light and heavy touch. he'll gently caress my hand against his cheek and almost never complains if I do so and he absolutely loves hugs. it's primarily the slowly developed communication, lack of social interaction with peers (he interacts up the wazoo with adults, if they pay attention, and he decides he likes them) repetative motion and severe developmental delay that seems to have given him the diagnosis. They also used an occupational therapist to evaluate him, in addition to a nurse, nutritionist, special ed teacher, social worker, and psychologist. We also noticed he ignored just about everyone who evaluated him except for the psychologist. so they didn't give him credit for eye contact (which has been discussed as overrated in this group) when he makes a ton of it, at least not really any less than the average person. The psychologist figured it may have been due to her dark hair (that happened to be a similar style to his godmother) - all of the women in his life at that time had brown hair, and the other people evaluating him had light hair. it also may have had something to do with her far more casual demeanor, and she seemed to know how to get him to interact. honestly now that I think about it, I should have found out if she takes patients or if she just works with the early on program...

coincidence?

I dropped by some stuff I forgot to send off with him to school this morning.

he was near me so I crouched on the floor held my arms out and said
"can Mommy have a hug?" His teacher said "bye Mommy" so he knew I
wasn't picking him up.

He hugged me, played with my hands for a bit, and I said "you can go
play now." and then he took off.

I've no idea if he was responding to my words, or if it was a
coincidence. but it'd be nice to think he'd been responding to my
words. I think he may have been, as he usually doesn't take off from
me like that. but he was in a large open area with plenty of room to
run around.

morning boy

Definitely think he's naturally a morning person, even though he tends
to stay up late.

day before yesterday he fell asleep in the car at 5pm. didn't wake up
till 530 am (yay for me having to get up that early :s )

yesterday, he fell asleep 730-8ish and stayed asleep till 730-745 AM

He's in the absolute best mood. and was in a pretty good mood
yesterday too. no crying fits like he occasionally has. except for at
grandma teresa's when they tried giving him orange juice or water
after drinking sunny d (read: he wanted more sugar!). a cup of milk
calmed him down though.

When he was an infant, he'd get cranky if he wasn't in bed by 8pm.
he'd wake up just enough to eat overnight, and completely wake up at
6am for a feeding and change and then let me relax until 8 or 10am (ie
he either went back to sleep or laid quietly next to me - the eldest
was never up before 10am at that time unless she had to be). a couple
nights of being out late at the inlaws, so he couldn't go to sleep at
8pm completely ruined it. but occasionally he gets back on that
schedule.

Basketball

just posting up a storm, aren't I?

forgot. the other day.

He got home from school. had fallen asleep in the car. woke up. is
extremely grumpy and cries alot when he wakes up from a nap. -- oh, he
was just checking to see if I was watching and I wasn't :( ... -- anyway.
he was crying so I took him outside, cause he likes to be outside he
ran around sometimes wanted me to pick him up, still upset. so I
finally took him out to the basketball court and sat cross legged on
the ground. he curled up in my lap and tried to get comfortable and
complained off and on... then some boys came to play basketball. He
quieted at the sound of the ball hitting the asphalt. Apparently the
sound was soothing.

contemplation

all are asleep except me and him. he's dancing around the room
(currently has an empty pop can on the floor and is dancing around
it), testing textures, talking occasionally looking at me, it's like
we're speding time but not.

My house is a mess. I want to set it up so the whole living room is a
play place for him. but I need to clean and keep clean first. I'm just
wondering what this time would be like in a more preferable
environment. right now it is awful calming. he is magical.

he never ceases to amaze

he just approached me, took my hand, placed it on his cheek and put
his nose up to mine...

a priceless moment.

Sleepy

HPIM0230
Originally uploaded by navidoll.

response without eye contact

well there was the sticking the hand out when I wasn't even talking to him...

As he was getting out of his high chair, I put my arms out and said
"tristan I give you a hug" and kept my arms out. didn't look at me
once but came straight over (he had to walk around a basket that was
on the floor so he wasn't looking at me till he approached me...
wouldn't have been as surprising if it were a straight shot for him.

Stealing the last of a sandwich

It's okay... she doesn't like the crust anyway:

All three! yipeee!

All three! yipeee!
Originally uploaded by navidoll.

wait a minute... that's mommy....

I think it took tristan a sec to realize it was mommy trying to get
him to stand up at school. He was going to curl up on some pillows and
I was asking him if he was tired and reaching my hand out to him and
when he looked at me and decided to get up.... I could just see him
come out of whatever he was thinking and realize it was mommy talking
to him. He got right up after that.

I thought it was a cool idea.

I don't really put anything political here. this is about tristan. but it's a cool idea.

accepting

this post isn't really so much about tristan.

it's about kids' reaction to him.

I go to his daycare, and kids are so excited to see him. they're like
tristan!. I pick his sister up during the week from it (he goes to
another one in the week) and the woman's son is like where's tristan?

he doesn't really pay attention to the other kids most of the time. he
gets upset easy and is in his own world. you wouldn't think they'd
like him. but they do.

but part of me doesn't wonder if his infectious joy is infectious to
others, and not just his family. When he's smiling, it's like the
whole room glows.

cute

I fell asleep on the couch with the baby last night. Tristan was still
up and running around. Some time after I fell asleep, hubby wakes me
up to point out that tristan is curled up right next to us on the
chair, sleeping. He was cute. He went over there and went to sleep all
by himself. usually if he goes to sleep without coaxing he drops
wherever he happens to be - he doesn't actively curl up next to mommy
- it was cute.

lamps

Trister likes putting his arm on lightbulbs. we haven't found a lamp he can't get to so he didn't have one in his room. Just found a flourescent bulbed lamp that the bulb is incased in plastic. just had it on for a couple hrs. lamp = warm, not hot. so he probably can't brake it and he probably can't burn himself on it. score!

Spoon

I didn't have time to finish my lunch on my lunch so I took it with me. food container was disposable, spoon was not. so I threw the spoon in my purse after work. took it out when going through my purse and as soon as I pulled it out tristan comes across the room and grabs it. won't eat with them but he sure loves "eating" them - he taps them on his teeth and hits things with them to make sounds.

:pdoh:

That pulls up an icon on the pinky forum for a pinky smacking itself in the head. like "doh!"

I left the house to get the kids and neglected to take care of the preserves. shortly after I got home, I heard Tristan in the bathroom.
I figure, okay, I left it open, and he probably wants a bath.

I get in there and the top to the jam is in the bathtub and he's covered in jam.

so I give him a shower (he loves showers and baths - he's a fish)

I go looking for the jar of jam. figured he just stuck his hand in it and ate it, like usual...

My bed, which happened not to have a sheet on it at the time, is literally covered in berry preserves, and the empty jar is in the window.

Like I said :pdoh:

At least he had fun.

sneaky boy pt 2

Lily was happy. Tristan came over by her and sat next to her. He said something that sounded suspiciously like 'cuddle cuddle'. I went to reach for the camera. Then Neal goes, he's got her pacifier. He grabbed it and got up and walked away....

Stepping back

I found this here: http://www.purdue.edu/UNS/html4ever/0007.Corbetta.babybrain.html

"August 2000

Researchers look at brain and behavior
development in infants

WEST LAFAYETTE, Ind. – Taking two steps forward sometimes requires a step back when it comes to babies' motor development, according to ongoing research at Purdue University.

"These findings indicate that as a baby learns a new skill, such as walking, the brain appears to reorganize itself, resulting in a temporary developmental step backward," says Daniela Corbetta, a professor of kinesiology and health science and director of Purdue's Infant Motor Development Laboratory."

Taken out of context, Tristan didn't exactly step forward normally after stepping back. He didn't show any signs until he started really walking (15 month-ish)... at 18 months, he was about 6 months behind... and now, at 3, well he's a little bit further along.

At least he seems to be consistently stepping forward now. I'm so glad he's in school.

 

Coins

Tristan likes to suck on coins, so we have to try to keep them away from him. Well, he found some today. I went over to him and held my hand under his chin and he dropped them out of his mouth into my hand (I know, yuck, but I gotta do it). Well he's got two back up quarters in his left hand ready to replace them. so I had to grab those to before he got those in his mouth. sneaky little guy.