hug

can't believe I didn't post.

Yesterday tristan was standing on a chair and hugged me and said hug
and proceeded to continue hugging me and then asked to be held upside
down by leaning his head back.

:)

argh

so I'm making beef fried rice (in one pan) so I cooked the meat and
stored it in a sealed container while I cooked the rice. tristan's
hugging it, real cute. well after taking it away repeatedly, he
apparently managed to hug it so hard that he's squeezed it open and
dumped half of it all over the place. then he proceeded to cry at me
until I fed him, though it appears he's distracted himself for a
moment.

chocolate cake

and now he's painting himself with the cake in the process of trying
to get it off his fingers...

birthday cake

just had tristan put his birthday cake in my hand, upside down, in its
container. I think he wants some...

door

tristan is swinging my bedroom door back and forth from the wall and
putting his hand in between the door and wall and laughing and
jabbering at it and saying something that sounds like ow and aaaaaa

now he's tapping the doorknob with a stick in his right hand while
continuing to do the above.

he seems quite content.

pressies

trying to figure what I can get tristan that he'll play with as much
as he's been playing w/ his christmas present....

drummy

Christmas was interesting for trister. He ran all over the house (and
his sister crawled) during present unwrapping, so I had to either open
gifts for him or chase him down and pick him up or chase him down and
open in front of him.

he got all sorts of baby toys, which is good, because they're the kind
that make sounds or have interesting textures. He likes them.

I got him a music set, with a drum on a stick, a stick with bells, a
triangle, a weird stick thing, and maracas (sp?). He loves the drom
and the maracas. He likes to tap a maraca on things and likes to tap
things on the drum :)

Santa put a play kitchen utensil set in his stocking. little metal
ladels and spatula and whisk and a wooden spoon and spatula. he liked
them, and used them to tap on his drum.

right now he is tapping a plastic spoon on a cookie, and I have to go
save the cookies from him.

pressies

Got this music set with what looks like a tamborine on a stick with no
symbols for trister

opened it up (but didn't take it out) and showed it to him to see how
he likes it.

I loved it and tapped on and stroked the drum and tried to take it out
of the container.

hopefully we get that reaction on christmas eve. :)

Yo-Yo Ma

I am such a .... I don't know.

I couldn't resist and gave them their present early (imma doing the
real shopping on friday anyway)

anyway. the classical music on tv seems to have lowered the volume in
my household just a bit. and it is much more relaxing than regular tv.
:D

dvd we're watching, vol 3 struggle for hope, had too much explaining
how they made it in the beginning but the music is beautiful.

Toy tristan likes

tristan doesn't 'play' with toys.

He sure likes this thing though (Lily's bday pressie from godmom):
http://trus.imageg.net/graphics/product_images/pTRU1-2878312dt.jpg

and aaaaaaaaaaack bloggers down!

Plugged Autism Search

Pluggd Demo

found via Wired


podcast audio search

messy boy

my completely messy just woke up from a nap crying boy has turned into
a clean content boy after a shower and then a bath. :)

it will take days to fix the mess he made whilst I was at work :(

This is my life

looking forward to two IEPs in one week.

Tristan already had one, but he needs another because they're moving
him to a new school.

AI Program visit

visited tristan's potential new school.

It's closer to Lola's (I can see trying to arrange parent teacher
conferences on the same day) but harder to get in and out of than his
current school (not the school itself but the neighborhood - train
tracks and other schools in the area pose issues). So it may or may
not be easier to get him there if he misses the bus.

It's not set in stone - some children need to transition out for him
to transition in. but it's pretty sure he'll begin after winter break.

I never think to ask questions...

All the kids there are autistic. and I was amazed at how they all sat
for story time and listening to music time.

The all use picture schedules much like Tristan's object schedule. and
some facilitated communication (holding the childs hand to help the
child focus and direct)

There's a variety of developmental abilities in the small room.

The teacher's son goes to the same daycare as tristan does after
school and she plans on popping in when she picks up her son to
observe him :) so she can meet him. She'll also be visiting his
regular school when she gets a chance.

They'll start letting him do whatever, until he gets used to the
class. He'll then have alternating choice time and specific
instructrion time. They'll also help steer choice time to be
beneficial.

They have a trampoline in the room :D

fingers are crossed that everything goes smoothly and this is good for him.

Also, as we were wrapping up, one of the boys that will be
transitioning out came by and gave the autism specialist a half hug,
and lightly pressed against my side for a second. I explaind that
Tristan also does stuff like that and will spontaneously go up to you
and hug you sometimes. His current teacher then remarked, with a smile
that they will miss him very much. :)

found at meijer

pro
freshionals

corn brush

by Good Cook

for $2.99

Just like those little brushes they use for therapy for Tristan,
except oval instead of square.
If you read and remember the name of the therapy, please reply! It
involves brushing his limbs and moving his joints.

With a nice handle. The handle is also the perfect size for Tristan to
hang on to, as he likes to have an item of that size, preferably
roundish, in his hand.

two birds w/ one stone. yay!

and I found it at the Okemos Meijer to be exact. In the produce aisle,
on a little stand with hang tags. had other producy items like another
type of brush that resembled a round scrub brush. It was near the
center aisle. (in case by some freak chance someone in the area who
needs a one of those things happens to read this)

I'll like maybe bring it to ganpa's and post a pic on flickr with this
same description, I think.

AI program

We are looking at putting tristan in our county's AI program:
http://www.inghamisd.org/schools/ai_program.html

there's an opening and since tristan wil be four soon, we can look at
different options for him, other than the special needs preschool
class he's in.

This will offer a full day of instruction, and will be in an area
school, with bussing provided by his home district

They say it's an intensive program and most kids don't need to
continue through 5th grade full day and most are able to function in a
regular classroom within a few years

I have my fingers crossed that all goes well

I visit it next Tuesday.

I'm pretty amazed at how he seems to get into these programs with
limited openings.

the fall after he was in Early On, they got him in preschool at not
quite 3 (the law says 2.5 but usually they wait until the child is 3
unless they believe education will be beneficial earlier) and he got
into a limited seat summer program so he had school all summer, and
now this. I am pleased. They keep saying that a lot of things he does
are really good signs (like being able to tell between skittles and an
m&m wrapper). I'm hopeful but cautious.

I've read that usually real intensive 40hr/week therapy is needed for
progress in kids like him and usually it's better started earlier, as
in the 2-3 range rather than the 4 yr old range, but they seem to
think he will be a kid that will be able to progress significantly in
this program. I really hope so. I know he's bright but it's all
internal and hard for people to see. He likes school so much, I'm
hoping for the best. I also like that even for the lower developed
kids, they still attempt to integrate them with neurotypical children
for at least a few minutes.

they also apparently frequently take trips to the haslett high school
pool. and he loves loves loves to swim. so that is good. The school he
was at in the summer I think had an on site pool so he went there
frequently and I'd get notes on how he loves to swim - I know this of
course from his time in the bathtub and his tendency to try to jump in
the pool at grandpa's - I remember him jumping in the deep end once
and he kept himself afloat for the fraction of a second before my
husband leaped in faster than I've ever seen him move to grab him. and
at a low depth family pool we went to with his godmom he was just
jumping under water. it as great.

I know I said part of me feels like this is another lets get tristan
outta here but it's better for him so even if it is it's okay (he
switched teachers from last school year, but I think that was
partially because his teacher's classroom was changing)

part of me also wonders about that I asked at his IEP in Oct if he
should get any additional therapy of any sort, and they said no, what
was at his school is fine, but maybe that was partially because they
were hoping to get him in this program that will provide what he
needs.

all my fingers are crossed. I want the best for him. and I want him to
be happy and school seems to make him happy.

tristan & stuff

haven't posted much about the kids lately. and the one person who
reads the regularly will know about this stuff already anyway.

tristan has said "alu" and "alu-oo, mom" recently, when giving a hug.
the alu or alu-oo has been around awhile (it's "I love you" as one
word, and probably means "hug!"). But, alu-oo, mom is putting two
words together.

and trister is looking at a possible spot in a full day school for
autistic children. yay! he'll go back to his main school once he meets
"certain developmental milestones," whatever that means.

He gets to go there in January, assuming everything runs smoothly,
since he's going to 4. It'd be nice if the age for such programs was
lower, as I've heard earlier intervention is better done earlier.

spam posting bout lily now

(well I'm not spam posting on lily's blog since I think the last few
posts that mentioned her didn't get sent there I'm spam posting on the
main blog with all of us)

anyway.

she stayed w/ a friend while neal went a hunting and I learned....

SHE WILL FALL ASLEEP IN HER PLAYPEN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(we don't have room for a crib)

WaHooooooooooooooooooooooo!

:D

and now tristan's gonna climb in and wake her up. actually I think he
thought about it saw her sleeping and changed his mind. but it still
woke her up.

oh, and one more thing on tristan

not sure if I mentioned this here but he's been copying his sister's
bledder bledder bleh, I guess cause he sees us doing it back and forth
with her and getting so excited (we get excited with him too but I
guess it's easier for him if he's observing us w/ her)

so she's like waving if you say hello, esp if you wave at her

so I'm doing that more anamatedly, since the school is working on
getting him to wave

communication.

last week, I think maybe on Friday, I pointed towards the bus as he
was contemplating the playground and he walked toward it.

Today I came and picked him up from daycare, and held his hand instead
of picking him up.

One of the teachers there asked for a hug before he left, he turned
towards her but hesitated (I interpretted that as yes I want a hug but
don't take me from mommy, I'm ready to go home)

When we got out of the fence (he'd been outside), I directed him
towards the car and asked him where he goes.

Initially he hesitated. then I turned him towards the car again and
asked again. I then put my hand in his and he took me to the door and
brought my hand towards the handle..

When we got home I held his hand and took him w/ me to check the mail
(the boxes are under a stairwell) He just danced around nearby (did
not take off) while I checked the mail.

I then took his hand and we walked towards our apartment. he pulled
back until I switched so he was just holding my finger, instead of
holding hands. I then let go as we stood in front of the door and
asked him to go in. I opened the screen door, he did not take off, I
opened the inside door and he went right in (he usually tries to run
around outside when we are heading home, if he's awake enough).

Then I had come out of the bathroom, and he decided he wanted a bath
so after I'd closed the door he took my hand and then put it on the
knob :)

fishy

he's had I don't know how many shower/baths today - basically cause
I'm being lazy and he loves it - um, like um it's water therapy - ya
that's it ;)

exhausting

I just had to jump up and down singing and dancing and clapping to
keep the little ones from crying while waiting for Lola to get out of
the shower so I could put Tristan in.

Poop.

Poop.

Poop.

poop. poop. poop.

That's the last time I say my son doesn't do something that people say
autistic kids do. I swear every time I do, he starts it up (I said he
didn't smear back when he was first diagnosed. but then, he was only
2.5 then, bout a year or so ago - god it feels like ages).

I get to clean the bathtub.

again.

I cleaned it out this morning....

I guess it's better in the bathtub than in his bedroom. or on my bed.

wait time

at his iep we discussed wait time (this was like oct 27)

we had noticed that according to the notes that got sent home, he was following directions at his summer school after 2 prompts, but didn't appear to be doing that here

the summer school class had all autistic children and had 4 hrs vs 2.5 hrs

they figured the summer school was probably giving him more time to respond and therefore caught him following directions.

they recommended at the iep giving him wait time.

so he was sitting across from me the other night wasn't playing w/ anything really and kept looking at me.

so I clapped my hands, held my arms out (he used to come running as soon as I did this) and said hug, slowly over and over again, while keeping my arms out and looking at him.

He eventually grinned at me got up and came over for a hug.

tried I think later that evening or the next day and it didn't work but he had something he was playing with and Lily was trying to hug me at the same time. He did look up at me and grin, which indicates he acknowledged the request, I think.


Oh, and at the iep, they said the couple of times it sounded like he was saying my name, probably was my name :)

high chair

mommy's hand on try = more food

mommy's hand on side = let me out!

:)

Halloween

HPIM0916
Originally uploaded by navidoll.

(the description in the photo describes the same)

Tristan doesn't seem to get it.

We'd go up to the houses, he'd get all excited. and get mad when he didn't get to go in or couldn't bury his face in the candy bowl they held out to him.

He did seem to like dancing on the decks, when they had decks, and he was very interested in scary decorations.

When we were wrapping things up, we were tired, so we let Lola go up to the houses across the street from where we were and we watched her go, with the strollers kept with us. Lola always got some candy for Tristan (when she stops and thinks, she's the most considerate little girl, she just doesn't always stop and think).

We hadn't had him strapped in the stroller, as we'd been getting him out and walking him up to the doorsteps earlier. So after once or twice watching Lola go up and get candy, he decided to copy her, got up out of the stroller, grabbed my hand, and let me walk him across the street.

He did get mad again when we skipped a house she'd gone to so we could catch up though.

Understanding?

I picked him up from daycare yesterday, and had Lily w/ me.

So I put his hand on the car while I get her in. (he tends to run off otherwise and this way he either stays there or he strokes the car before running off, so I have time to at least get her in the car, if not buckle her up, before getting him)

Well this time, he tried to go in on the side I was loading Lily (probably 'cause usually I put his hand on the car, throw all his stuff thruogh the window and then get him in)

I said "No, Tristan, you get in on the other side"

I don't know if he understood me, or noticed his booster seat wasn't on that side, but he immediately walked around the car to his door and proceeded to stroke it.

Then he started stroking the truck next to us, in which a father had just completed loading himself and his daughter, so I figured I better stop buckling Lily before Tristan got himself run over.... (thankfully, however, the dad had seen tristan and didn't move until I got him in the car and moved to the other side to finish buckling Lily)

Mom

I hear a kid say "Mom"

I figured it was Lola.

nope.

Tristan was in the shower, had said Mom (word's come and go so a singular mom and not mom mom mom is rare, esp when sounding like he's calling for me and not just saying mom)

well he'd been taking a shower

only he'd managed to plug the tub (the right way, with the lever, and not with tp)

and it was overflowing

I guess he figured he had to let me know.

More on More food

Last night, when we were eating mcdonalds...

Tristan had his own nuggets

He finished them, held his hands together (he'd been taught the sign for more - he doesn't do it exactly, but we get the idea)
He then looked at us with a face that said, "please." He didn't make a noise.

Well, he most certainly got more food and loads of praise from mom for being sooooo polite.

I'm pretty sure most of the time he gets into things and gets surly and makes messes are simply because we don't pick up the cues he's giving us beforehand.

spinning

He was spinning in circles, and I started spinning right alongside him. and then he grabbed my hands and started jumping with me and then spinning in circles holding my hands and we were spinning together and then we were jumping again. He'd gotten so happy that I was copying him and he was really engaging me. it was pure fun.

Online Autism Conference

I'm gonna try and attend a bit
http://www.awares.org/conferences/default.asp

No Hot Water

We lost our hot water during the aforementioned bath (it was actually a shower - so not so good - luckily the lil one doesn't mind cool water too much)

We regained it - just in time for Trister to cover himself head to foot in poop.

Understanding!

He definitely knows the word bath.

I asked him if he wanted one, then he let me take his hand, and instead of leading him to the bathroom, I said, where do we go when we want a bath? and he walked straight over there.

He will also walk right into his bedroom after we've said it's bedtime frequently, even if he doesn't want to go. and last night he opened his bedroom door, and peered out and then walked straight to the bathroom got in the bathtub and put his hand on the faucet, like "can I have a bath?" because he'd been sent to bed without one.

communication is sweet

nearness

so tristan has taken to climbing behind me on the chair if I'm on neal's computer. sometimes he does the rocking on his belly thing that looks weird and I distract him, as the school suggests that. This evening he climed up here and laid on his back behind me with his feet in the air playing with somethign (I don't remember what it was, he likes to play with objects in his hands) wish I had my camera handy at the time.

Hugs

Joy is having him turn look you straight in the eye, walk up to you, and open his arms while smiling

:)

Soooo Cute

Tristan has been put to bed.

I just heard him, it sounded like he was right by his door (he climbs
off the bed and falls asleep there frequently)

he said, quietly, 'wiwy' (which we've figured is 'Lily')

I had to fight the urge to run in there, scoop him up and hug him.

New Combined blog!

Beware, also has my random thoughts

but news about kids too!

NaviMama

so far I've just got Lily and Tristan's March 1 posts up.

oh, and I'll still be updating these, too. the new one is if people only want one blog to check. email posts will make it fairly easy to cross post. I'm keeping these up in case any of the small handful of people who reads these only wants to check one of the blogs.

hugs

hugs
Originally uploaded by navidoll.

he came up to me as I was at the puter and rested his head on my shoulder and was hugging me (alternating between shoulders) and then he grabbed my cheeks and ran away. was trying to aim lower with the camera to have more of him in the shot. none of the other pictures came out right. this was the closest

kinda hard to aim when the kid is hanging on your arms.

then afterward, I went to take care of some groceries, and he took my hand and walked to the water table and proudly showed me that he had dumped my camera in it...

more water table

I pushed it under the table to get it out of the way as we were
heading to go shopping. it's just barely under the table so he pulled
the drawer out just a bit so he could still play with the water

Water Table

Water Table
Originally uploaded by navidoll.

Just totally made Tristan's day.

Tested the drawer, to make sure it would hold water without leaking, then ripped the top off of it and turned it into an inexpensive water table. He had fun. after Lola walked away, he proceeded to dance around it with one hand in the water. :)

sleepy

Tristan likes to sleep near a fan

We were trying to get Lily to sleep in her playyard and had a fan
nearby. She was going in and out of it because she'd wake up and
scream when we tried to put her in it. Tristan apparently figured out
that she'd be sleeping there and pointed the fan towards the playpen
and then curled up on the floor with a pillow right next to the
playpen.

Cuteness

2 things

was laying on the bed w/Lily

Tristan came up, and rocked his head on my shoulder so I could kiss
his cheek then he put his lips on my cheek (he doesn't actually kiss)

Then

he laid his head on my knee when I was sitting on the couch looked up
at me and said "luthe yoo"

Tristan got up today and walked into my room. Climbed on my bed by
Lily and carefully walked over her and then cuddled my head. He then
proceeded to move around on the bed and periodically come over to me
for more cuddles. so cute.

This post is supposed to be titled waking up but email posting isn't working and well for some reason blogger doesn't let me put a title on the trister's blog when posting from there.

poo

all over my sister's basement....

circles

Tristan likes to put something on the floor and dance around it. One
of the bus drivers thought it might be duck duck goose he's imitating.

Well, I was sitting on the floor, so he started dancing round and
round me. and ended it by climbing in my lap and saying what sounds
like "hug you".

haircut

I think he's digging his haircut. He keeps putting his face or the
side of his head or the back of his head on my face, or my shoulder or
my lap...

course, last night, neal lightly scratched his head like he
occasionally does and tristan cried. I guess he wasn't ready for it w/
his haircut. just mommy can mess with the new do, I guess.

smiles

asked if I could take more pictures. He looked at me sideways.

asked for a hug, including clap clap and motion by holding my arms
out, palms and two fingers up and motioned to 'come here' with the two
fingers on each hand.

he looked straight at me grinned, and came over and hugged me

sooooo cute!

spinning cheese

spinning cheese
Originally uploaded by navidoll.

he's spinning a parmesan cheese shaker

mmmmm Cotton Candy

Cotton Candy
Originally uploaded by navidoll.

he just grabbed a chunk and shoved it in his mouth. He really liked the texture of it. we figured he would he has a bad habit of eating tissue.

I had a picture of him with a bigger chunk but the batteries died and didn't save it :(

I took the big chunk away from him and gave him a small piece after taking the shot. figured this was a little too much at once.

Standing on a table

HPIM0936
Originally uploaded by navidoll.

squeeee

ran towards the little guy squealing...

and then hugged him

he looked startled like he didn't know what was going on, and then
smiled. he loves hugs.

Godmom and I took all three to the aquatic center (a big outdoor pool
with 0" depth that slowly goes up to about 3 or 4 feet plus a couple
sectioned off deeper areas).

While he'll float in the bathtub if there's enough water, he's too
cautious to completely try there.

but he absolutely loved it

an he was jumping up and down and dunking himself
and he liked it when godmom tossed him in the water and caught him
just as he hit the water
and he also would walk on his hands and kick with his feet (he could
go pretty fast doing that)
and at one point he tried to copy my doggy paddle with one toe on the
bottom of the pool.

also in dunking himself cause he completely lets his arms and legs go
wild he scared both godmom at one point when he first got in an
another woman (I was making my way toward him) cause it looked like he
was falling under.

and he was smiling and happy and he loved the little falls and the
area where the water spurts up

an he was cautious on the toddler water slide.

It was so amazing watching him.

His smile lights up the room

Lily is in daycare today. so trister and Lola can have more of my
attention today. and well tristan, he's so... I don't know how to
describe it. He just, is happy and well I don't know, when I've been
just focusing on him, I feel so un-stressed. (which is a feeling I
don't feel to often lately)

Tristan and Lily

Tristan and Lily
Originally uploaded by navidoll.

Celebrate Neurodiversity

Austistic Pride Day is on Father's day.

Interesting. For us it's the first father's day after Tristan was
labeled autistic.

http://www.aspiesforfreedom.org/wiki/index.php?title=Autistic_Pride_Day

http://www.aspiesforfreedom.org/autisticprideday/

the first link explains why the date was chosen.

siblings

Tristan keeps going up to Lily and cuddling her, they'll hold hands,
or just now, he put his face gently next to hers and she reached out
and touched his face.

easy chair

tristan used to always sit in my lap and lean back on me like I was an
easy chair.

he especially liked it when I was pregnant, cause Lily would kick him.

well, he noticed lily was next to me, an not in my lap.

He then waited until Lily lifted her feet up (her feet were closest to
me an stepped between us an climbed into my lap an sat on me like I
was an easy chair.

he's since been climbing in and out of my lap and making me hug him an
tickle him.

:)

Autism ADHD, etc

Best part of the trip
Originally uploaded by Mauvis.

I've got a pic of tristan with these things and posted it. and it reminded this mom of this pic so much that she had to post it herself

This post involves comments made on the above picture and is a response to the comment above the one in which I reference this blog:

I've heard of the multi-diagnoses and misdiagnoses between the two.

So far the school system has done the primary evaluation of tristan. I need to get both of my kids evaluated further. had a bit of a bad experience with a therapist recommended by a dr we have a lot of faith in, so I'm a bit wary, I don't want to drag my kids through the number of bad therapists my husband says he went through as a child - I don't know for sure if they were bad or he just didn't like them, he has a lot of issues - My daughter's therapist treated her as a classic adhd/explosive child case and was convinced the child ruled our household when neither is true (though we are a household that negotiates and some more traditional paradigms might view that as letting the child rule) and recommended treatment that garnered a violent response from a nonviolent child - that meeting made me decide this wasn't the therapist for my daughter.

My son seems to be severely understimulated, to tell you the truth, unless it involves his head, which is primarily his ears (touch, not so much sound), and before he got the autism diagnosis, I was wondering if he didn't have an early case of adhd, that may have somehow affected him developmentally due to the early onset (complete speculation - I've never read anything of the sort). Having dealt with an adhd husband, I had noticed many similarities.

His father has been diagnosed both ADHD and bipolar disorder (another two I've heard are frequently confused with eachother, esp in children). I've been told by professionals that his older sister shows signs of both (she has a wonderful school system that has provided special ed services despite her academic excellence, that works on the areas she needs help with and she sees a social worker weekly).

He does have tantrums for no apparent reason. though we've learned it's usu related to tiredness, an inability to communicate and not getting enough attention - which are fairly normal reasons for a neurotypical 3 yr old to melt down, let alone one that's not talking yet - I started giving him something to drink or eat or putting him on my bed - a large place to lay down and family members don't go in there generally until bedtime - or laying him down near a fan or making sure I periodically look in his direction - whatever I guess appears to be the cause - and the tantrums aren't nearly as severe. there was one day I noticed him periodically watching me to see if I was paying attention and he'd start grumbling if I wasn't looking at him. He has two sisters that garner a lot of attention (esp one being an infant, and the other having her own issues) and extended family doesn't tend to interact with him a great deal (not that he sees them regularly). I've learned both my children seem to be far more intuitive than they let on and I'm sure he feels ignored.

He actually seems to like both light and heavy touch. he'll gently caress my hand against his cheek and almost never complains if I do so and he absolutely loves hugs. it's primarily the slowly developed communication, lack of social interaction with peers (he interacts up the wazoo with adults, if they pay attention, and he decides he likes them) repetative motion and severe developmental delay that seems to have given him the diagnosis. They also used an occupational therapist to evaluate him, in addition to a nurse, nutritionist, special ed teacher, social worker, and psychologist. We also noticed he ignored just about everyone who evaluated him except for the psychologist. so they didn't give him credit for eye contact (which has been discussed as overrated in this group) when he makes a ton of it, at least not really any less than the average person. The psychologist figured it may have been due to her dark hair (that happened to be a similar style to his godmother) - all of the women in his life at that time had brown hair, and the other people evaluating him had light hair. it also may have had something to do with her far more casual demeanor, and she seemed to know how to get him to interact. honestly now that I think about it, I should have found out if she takes patients or if she just works with the early on program...

coincidence?

I dropped by some stuff I forgot to send off with him to school this morning.

he was near me so I crouched on the floor held my arms out and said
"can Mommy have a hug?" His teacher said "bye Mommy" so he knew I
wasn't picking him up.

He hugged me, played with my hands for a bit, and I said "you can go
play now." and then he took off.

I've no idea if he was responding to my words, or if it was a
coincidence. but it'd be nice to think he'd been responding to my
words. I think he may have been, as he usually doesn't take off from
me like that. but he was in a large open area with plenty of room to
run around.

morning boy

Definitely think he's naturally a morning person, even though he tends
to stay up late.

day before yesterday he fell asleep in the car at 5pm. didn't wake up
till 530 am (yay for me having to get up that early :s )

yesterday, he fell asleep 730-8ish and stayed asleep till 730-745 AM

He's in the absolute best mood. and was in a pretty good mood
yesterday too. no crying fits like he occasionally has. except for at
grandma teresa's when they tried giving him orange juice or water
after drinking sunny d (read: he wanted more sugar!). a cup of milk
calmed him down though.

When he was an infant, he'd get cranky if he wasn't in bed by 8pm.
he'd wake up just enough to eat overnight, and completely wake up at
6am for a feeding and change and then let me relax until 8 or 10am (ie
he either went back to sleep or laid quietly next to me - the eldest
was never up before 10am at that time unless she had to be). a couple
nights of being out late at the inlaws, so he couldn't go to sleep at
8pm completely ruined it. but occasionally he gets back on that
schedule.

Basketball

just posting up a storm, aren't I?

forgot. the other day.

He got home from school. had fallen asleep in the car. woke up. is
extremely grumpy and cries alot when he wakes up from a nap. -- oh, he
was just checking to see if I was watching and I wasn't :( ... -- anyway.
he was crying so I took him outside, cause he likes to be outside he
ran around sometimes wanted me to pick him up, still upset. so I
finally took him out to the basketball court and sat cross legged on
the ground. he curled up in my lap and tried to get comfortable and
complained off and on... then some boys came to play basketball. He
quieted at the sound of the ball hitting the asphalt. Apparently the
sound was soothing.

contemplation

all are asleep except me and him. he's dancing around the room
(currently has an empty pop can on the floor and is dancing around
it), testing textures, talking occasionally looking at me, it's like
we're speding time but not.

My house is a mess. I want to set it up so the whole living room is a
play place for him. but I need to clean and keep clean first. I'm just
wondering what this time would be like in a more preferable
environment. right now it is awful calming. he is magical.

he never ceases to amaze

he just approached me, took my hand, placed it on his cheek and put
his nose up to mine...

a priceless moment.

Sleepy

HPIM0230
Originally uploaded by navidoll.

response without eye contact

well there was the sticking the hand out when I wasn't even talking to him...

As he was getting out of his high chair, I put my arms out and said
"tristan I give you a hug" and kept my arms out. didn't look at me
once but came straight over (he had to walk around a basket that was
on the floor so he wasn't looking at me till he approached me...
wouldn't have been as surprising if it were a straight shot for him.

Stealing the last of a sandwich

It's okay... she doesn't like the crust anyway:

All three! yipeee!

All three! yipeee!
Originally uploaded by navidoll.

wait a minute... that's mommy....

I think it took tristan a sec to realize it was mommy trying to get
him to stand up at school. He was going to curl up on some pillows and
I was asking him if he was tired and reaching my hand out to him and
when he looked at me and decided to get up.... I could just see him
come out of whatever he was thinking and realize it was mommy talking
to him. He got right up after that.

I thought it was a cool idea.

I don't really put anything political here. this is about tristan. but it's a cool idea.

accepting

this post isn't really so much about tristan.

it's about kids' reaction to him.

I go to his daycare, and kids are so excited to see him. they're like
tristan!. I pick his sister up during the week from it (he goes to
another one in the week) and the woman's son is like where's tristan?

he doesn't really pay attention to the other kids most of the time. he
gets upset easy and is in his own world. you wouldn't think they'd
like him. but they do.

but part of me doesn't wonder if his infectious joy is infectious to
others, and not just his family. When he's smiling, it's like the
whole room glows.

cute

I fell asleep on the couch with the baby last night. Tristan was still
up and running around. Some time after I fell asleep, hubby wakes me
up to point out that tristan is curled up right next to us on the
chair, sleeping. He was cute. He went over there and went to sleep all
by himself. usually if he goes to sleep without coaxing he drops
wherever he happens to be - he doesn't actively curl up next to mommy
- it was cute.

lamps

Trister likes putting his arm on lightbulbs. we haven't found a lamp he can't get to so he didn't have one in his room. Just found a flourescent bulbed lamp that the bulb is incased in plastic. just had it on for a couple hrs. lamp = warm, not hot. so he probably can't brake it and he probably can't burn himself on it. score!

Spoon

I didn't have time to finish my lunch on my lunch so I took it with me. food container was disposable, spoon was not. so I threw the spoon in my purse after work. took it out when going through my purse and as soon as I pulled it out tristan comes across the room and grabs it. won't eat with them but he sure loves "eating" them - he taps them on his teeth and hits things with them to make sounds.

:pdoh:

That pulls up an icon on the pinky forum for a pinky smacking itself in the head. like "doh!"

I left the house to get the kids and neglected to take care of the preserves. shortly after I got home, I heard Tristan in the bathroom.
I figure, okay, I left it open, and he probably wants a bath.

I get in there and the top to the jam is in the bathtub and he's covered in jam.

so I give him a shower (he loves showers and baths - he's a fish)

I go looking for the jar of jam. figured he just stuck his hand in it and ate it, like usual...

My bed, which happened not to have a sheet on it at the time, is literally covered in berry preserves, and the empty jar is in the window.

Like I said :pdoh:

At least he had fun.

sneaky boy pt 2

Lily was happy. Tristan came over by her and sat next to her. He said something that sounded suspiciously like 'cuddle cuddle'. I went to reach for the camera. Then Neal goes, he's got her pacifier. He grabbed it and got up and walked away....

Stepping back

I found this here: http://www.purdue.edu/UNS/html4ever/0007.Corbetta.babybrain.html

"August 2000

Researchers look at brain and behavior
development in infants

WEST LAFAYETTE, Ind. – Taking two steps forward sometimes requires a step back when it comes to babies' motor development, according to ongoing research at Purdue University.

"These findings indicate that as a baby learns a new skill, such as walking, the brain appears to reorganize itself, resulting in a temporary developmental step backward," says Daniela Corbetta, a professor of kinesiology and health science and director of Purdue's Infant Motor Development Laboratory."

Taken out of context, Tristan didn't exactly step forward normally after stepping back. He didn't show any signs until he started really walking (15 month-ish)... at 18 months, he was about 6 months behind... and now, at 3, well he's a little bit further along.

At least he seems to be consistently stepping forward now. I'm so glad he's in school.

 

Coins

Tristan likes to suck on coins, so we have to try to keep them away from him. Well, he found some today. I went over to him and held my hand under his chin and he dropped them out of his mouth into my hand (I know, yuck, but I gotta do it). Well he's got two back up quarters in his left hand ready to replace them. so I had to grab those to before he got those in his mouth. sneaky little guy.

Long night

Apparently at some point after Dad put Tristan to bed (I'd attempted to turn in early, but this didn't work out), Lola went to the bathroom (they share a room - we live in a 2 bdrm apt) and Tristan came out of the bedroom. Tristan proceeded to be very unhappy and crying. So neither Neal or I got any sleep. Neal tried feeding him some of a snack he'd made for himself. I made him numerous sandwiches, tried putting a dvd on in his and Lola's bedroom, let him sleep at the foot of our bed with the fan on. He fell asleep. but as soon as I moved him from our bed so that we could sleep in it, he woke up and proceeded crying again. We moved the fan into the living room so that he could sleep out there and be near the fan. Still didn't help. Ultimately we ended up putting him in the shower, as that seems to calm him. at the point he was almost asleep in the shower I took him out made him a sandwich and he finally went to sleep. It was well after 4 AM at this point. Then Lily started crying as soon as he was asleep (luckily she's made happy if I just feed her, so I was able to get a couple of hours of sleep in). I'm buying another fan for Tristan today. Maybe he'll be more likely to sleep in his room then.

Fishboy

Tristan loves the water

Sister

around the time he was peering through the blinds, Lily and I were on the couch. I was on the computer, and turned towards Lily to find Tristan between the wall and the arm of the couch gently stroking Lily's face with the back of his hand.

Kissing hands and peering outside

Tristan was eating in his highchair and I think it was when i brought him seconds or something to drink but he pointed at my mouth and touched it with his finger, so I obliged, and opened it. Then he stuck the back of his hand near my mouth (he does this with his own face frequently - he used to bite his hand). I had no clue what he was doing. every time I closed my mouth, he used his finger to try to open it. the only thing I could think of is he was trying to imitate the drs office, when they were trying to check his throat. they had tried opening his mouth with the popsicle stick thing (can't remember what it's called right now). Eventually I just kissed the back of his hand. So then he kept waving his hands toward me for a kiss.

Later, he was separating the blinds to watch some kids outside. Thought it was cute. Especially because he rarely pays attention to other children. He moved before I could get a pic.

dancing

Tristan likes spinning, running around things and spinning things (not sure if this is typical or a stereotype, but I've heard that's normal)

Last night he took a 2 liter of pop and balanced it on its top and started dancing and singing around it.

tonight he grabbed  lipstick and was holding it up in the air and dancing around it.

he's such a cutie pie.

strength

Took Tristan to urgent care Thursday night, so they could tell me he doesn't have chicken pox (school needed me to check because of a mild rash he had - he has sensitive skin)

Had the second Dr tell me he has a daughter w/ autism (first was Lily's er dr). 

Tristan had fallen asleep in the car and was not happy when he got woken up to have his throat checked (he slept through everything else), so he was crying

Dr. asked me where I find the strength. I never know what to say when ppl ask that. I just explained he's normally fairly good natured. but honestly, yes, he's a handful. but he's my son. there isn't strength. it just has to be done. I need to be there for him. Just like I need to be there for Lola and Lily. and frankly I think I'm not doing the greatest job. he deserves better. There's no strength to it at all. I just do it. I wish I could bring myself to do better. I love him.

Went out with all three today

We had an outing today. And taking 3 young children anywhere is always amusing.
Link Opens in a New Window.
I put this under an lj cut for a journal I don't update anymore cause the closest thing blogger seems to have applies to all posts. This thing is long.

Response!

Little boy slept all evening.... which means I got woken up at 530 AM. yay. looks like he's gonna do it again tonight.

I dropped him at daycare this morning, and he started to try to grab a little girl's sippy. I said "no, no tristan, that's not yours" and he stopped his approach and walked away!

I came in the door to pick him up, heard him saying "wiwy" (which I think is Lily) and I said it back, quietly, and he came running around the corner to hug me!

It's all very exciting for me.

oh, and I forgot, this isn't quite so new, and is fairly normal, but yesterday, when I got him from daycare, one of the teachers got his attention (he was outside) and pointed him towards me and he came running toward me, arms outstretched saying "uggy!" which is hug, so I picked him up and said "hug!" and hugged him.

Lucky Smile

Lucky Smile
Originally uploaded by navidoll.

He was cuddling his dad and I thought they were so cute I had to take a pic. Well then he starts coughing right as I turn the camera on and snap the picture. luckily, it recorded it when he was smiling, and not coughing. Pic's a bit blurry. my hands aren't very stable.

I'm happy. it's so hard to get a pic of him smiling, even though he smiles a lot. usually he's to interested in trying to get the camera from me...

Tristan likes his chair

He has a little rocker - it was an extra bouncer one of the fisher price rockers. My husband put it up just to get it out of the way, so he climbed up to where it was and sat on it. (Daddy got him down before he fell)

Tristan likes this pic I found on flickr

happy st. patrick's day!!!
Originally uploaded by woolloomooloo.

I'm a member of a Japanese toys group on flickr, and this pic was posted there. I left the puter to go take care of Lily and came back and Tristan was just staring at it. He loves green. the pic was posted by woolloomooloo on flickr.

Tristan sick

Neal woke me up cause he thought Tristan was more than just a little sick just before 2 AM. He was coughing and crying inconsolably. checked his temp and he'd spiked a 102 fever. called the dr, who told me to take him in to the er. just an ear infection and a soar throat, thank goodness.

Anyway, the kid kept smiling at me, which isn't normal when he's sick. he's usually absolutely miserable. I guess he liked being at the hospital with 100% of mommy's attention.

It's Bedtime Mommy

Tristan decided earlier this evening it was time for me to go to bed. When he wants something he'll take your hand and take you to it. He came over to me in the living room crying. grabbed my foot as my arms were busy w/ Lily. so I got up and let him take my hand. he led me to my bed and didn't quiet down until I acted like I was going to sleep.

Sleeping on the couch upright

Sleeping on the couch upright
Originally uploaded by navidoll.

They'll fall asleep anywhere. He was on my bed next to his dad's fan about 5-10 minutes before hand. and the jumping on the bed right after that. and his face is messy. can't keep it clean.

Music coming out of Mommy's ear!

I had my ipod in my pocket and in one ear while waiting for the bus this morning (I about never put it in both ears). While waiting for the bus (sometimes we wait a while as it can come as early as 755-8am but sometimes doesn't get here till 810) we go back and forth from walking around with him holding my hand and sometimes he wants me to pick him up. When I pick him up, he hugs me. he noticed the sound and pressed his face against mine so his right ear was right up against mine and listened. I thought it was cute.

And! Development! it's probably partly the noise that catches his attention but he's actually looking at vehicles I point at passing by!

Tristan is my son. He's 3 yrs old, a middle child and the only boy and has been identified as having autism spectrum disorder by the local school system. He frequently does odd things that make me smile. My sister thinks I should make a comic about him. Not to sure that would work out (I'm not that funny) and my drawing skills are rusty (I was pretty good in highschool), and part of me thinks that might be construed as making fun of him, but I decided I'd create a blog to post the funny and cute things he does to share with family members and friends (so they don't get like 3 emails in one day), so here it is, my tribute to my son. I may in the future create blogs for my daughters also, but I think Tristan sometimes feels left out and I want something special for him. I'll start out with the conversation that prompted my sister to suggest a comic. She was talking about her own three year old son growing plants. Here's a paraphrase of my response:

"I'm not real good with plants. Lola is, though. At school, her plants are always one of the biggest or best looking in the class. Then they come home and something happens and they die or Tristan eats them."

Now, that seemed like a normal comment to me. he eats everything. (from what I understand a lot of neurotypical kids eat everything, too). However, it made my sister chuckle.

Cute things from today (and yesterday):
I make him a sandwich every morning. He eats breakfast at his preschool (they switched from snacks to breakfast as they felt it would be a good learning experience) but needs something before the long bus ride and I'm usually in a hurry so he gets a sandwich frequently and now has decided he needs a sandwich when he first gets up or he's grumpy. Cereal's fine, but he has to have a sandwich first.

Today, he's sitting on the couch in the living room waiting for his sandwich. So I get the bread out and put it on the kitchen table and then I turn to get the knife and the jelly from the fridge. I turn back, he's still on the couch. I can't find the piece of bread I laid out. I was positive I'd put it on a saucer, but I don't see it. Turns out, he managed to go in the kitchen, grab the bread and walk back to the exact place he was sitting beforehand in the little bit of time I had my back turned. He's a sneaky little guy, when he wants to be.

As mentioned before, he eats everything; everything goes in his mouth, he like textures, especially smooth ones. He also likes his baby sister's pacifiers. Usually he chews them like this:


Today, he was sucking on the pacifier like a baby does. I think I just need to get him his own, blue ones. He had a John Lennon, Beautiful Boy one when he was a baby and I think I saw some of those at the store recently (He was sucking on his sister's pink John Lennon one - the one in the pic is a classic pooh one from Target)..... My excuse will be that if he sucks on a paci, he's not putting other things in his mouth ;)

Tristan also will often communicate to us by giving us something similar to what he is asking for or taking us to what he wantsn though if you leave something in his reach, he typically just grabs it, especially if it's sweet. His sister had a bag with a couple king sized candies in it yesterday. She left it sitting on a chair. Now, I've never seen him take her hand to ask her for something, but he must have figured they were hers, and not mine or her father's. He took her hand and walked her over to the bag, instead of just trying to grab the chocolate. She obliged and let him have a piece of candy. Now this may seem simple but that level of communication with his sister, instead of his parents appears a breakthrough to me. We cheered the fact that he asked for the candy, even though it was well within his reach to just grab himself.